All Jokes

"OOoh oh yes yes YES , oh you're so fantastic, yes yes your the best iv ever had,
do me again you make me so hot but this time ...in my ass you bad boy"

... i imagined her saying as she slept peacefully.
I hear that P.Diddy and some of the guys from Islamic state are going to be collaborating.
They are going to be covering 'Bang Bang' and are to be known as 'Puff Jihaddy'.
Just had a cold caller ring me up to discuss my recent accident. Anyway, hopefully I'll win a couple of grand for my bouts of Amnesia as to be honest, I can't remember having one
If I've learned anything from these ghost hunter shows, it's that everyone speaks English after they die.
My mate said, "Congratulations on your new job, how did you get it?"

I said, "The same way the Virgin Mary got Jesus."

He said, "A miracle?"

I said, "No. Sex that I can't tell anyone about."
They always say whenever there's religious trouble ''well you never get these kind of problems from a Buddhist'' - but I reckon those sneaky, re-incarnating bastards are just playing us all at the really, really long game...

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