All Jokes

You begin hugely in the music business and then have hit Saturday night TV shows.

They're cut short by falling ratings due to same old, same old and you then retire to a foreign villa.

A sudden event catapults public admiration, the like of which you'd have loved if you were alive. Everyone has a good word to say.

So if there's one thing to learn from all this..

Just die Simon Cowell, you cunt.
A black guy left his laptop open in Starbucks earlier so I had a quick snoop while he was in the toilet and it was full of child pornography!

I wanted to call the police but I had to wait for the black guy to come back first so I could find out who he nicked the laptop from.

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