All Jokes

It must have been really hard growing up as Dumbo the elephants with really massive ears.

Not because everyone made fun of him,

He must have heard every time his parents were having sex.
Today this kid in my class came back from Alabama and was showing off some cotton he got.
"Picked it myself" he said

My classmate Jerome was not impressed.
Despite my chronic alcoholism I still wanted to make sure Labour got elected in my town so all weekend I've been going around houses with a big bottle of vodka and introducing myself as their local UKIP councillor before taking a swig
I decided to run as a candidate in the last local elections, but my rivals found out about my slight drink problem. So my solution to this was to go door to door and say "You may or may not have heard in the press about my drink problem, but here in my hand is a shot glass filled with 25cl of Smirnoff vodka, and it is also the last drink that I will ever have."

Long story short, I'm having my stomach pumped after 1 road.

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