Abduction Jokes

Just been chatting to my neighbour's teenage daughter and it turns out she's really into UFOs and aliens.

Which is cool because tomorrow she's getting abducted.
I hate this hot weather, I have to keep my windows closed because all my neighbour's kids do is scream.

I'm seriously considering giving them back.
I saw a poster this morning for a missing five year old girl. Blue eyes, blonde hair, always smiling.

Anyway, this afternoon I was in the town hall, I looked to my right and saw a big curtain which over time had sagged and I could see through. I was shocked to see a little girl with her hands tied sitting on a mattress - five years old; like the poster, blue eyes; like the poster, blonde hair, like the poster and... No this one was bawling her eyes out.