The exam boards have recently released a set of exams which enable chavs to get some qualifications based on their real-life experience:

1. Terry nicks 15 stotties and 9 tins of Special Brew from Somerfield.

a. How mint will Terry's night be? (2)*

b. How long until the busies catch him?** (2)

c. How gay are the busies on a scale of 1 to 10?*** (2)

*1 mark awarded for use of 'buzzin'

**'Ah divven naah' is an acceptable answer

*** Extra marks awarded for exceeding the scale.
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2. Barry's stealing White Lightning and tabs from Costcutters. He brays 12 old ladies and the wifey behind the counter.

How long is Barry going to jail for? (4)
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3. Carl earns £4.20 an hour for some pure shit work. He works for 20 hours. How many packets of Space Raiders can he afford? (4) *

*At SPAR prices, even though they're well shit and a total rip-off, like
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1. "Somerfield is well shit and is pure for, like, gypsies cos it's pure cheap". Discuss, giving both sides of the opinion, or only your own if you can't be arsed. (8)
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