Hitler walks into the meeting room and turns to his trusted staff.
"I want you to organise the execution of 10,000 Jews and one kitten."
Everyone looks around the table and, after a long silence, Goering pipes up. "Mein Führer, why do you want to kill a kitten?"
Hitler smiles and turns to the rest of the table. "You see, no one cares about the Jews."
I went to a party last night. I thought I looked pretty smart, but some Jewish cunt said, "The '70s called... They want their shirt back!"
I said, "The '40s called... Your shower's ready."
How do you get a Jewish girl's number?
Roll up her sleeve.
What did the Nazis get after they installed tanning beds in Auschwitz?
Concentrated orange Jews.
Why did Hitler cross the road?
To get to the Genocide.
The Bradford Ripper is to appear in the Hague charged with genocide.
He single-handedly killed all of Bradford's caucasian population.
Why did the Israeli Commando cross the road?
To shoot the baby with the rattle about to open fire.
"Wake up, Jesus! It's time for your second coming." said God.
"It's been nearly 2000 years and my wounds still hurt." replies Jesus, whilst picking up a razor to trim his beard. "I was crucified, tortured and humiliated by my fellow Jews."
"Snap out of it boy" replied God.
Jesus, having nearly finished his shave, turns to God and asks, 'what time is it?'
"It's 12:30, August 2nd, 1934."
"No," said Jesus, leaving a small patch of hair under his nose, "It's payback time."
BBC NEWS: US State seeks Holocaust records.
6 million to beat.
I can't help but think that the Nazis could have added some much needed humour to the holocaust if they'd simply used nitrous oxide in one out of every ten showers.