A girl from work asked if I'd drive her home yesterday because it was raining heavily.
I agreed, we got talking, mainly about everyday things, what we liked doing, then about work for a bit. We got to her house before long.
She thanked me, went to get out of the car, stopped, looked hard at me and whispered, "How did you know where I lived?"
My attractive female neighbour is completely paranoid.
She thinks I'm following or even stalking her, she is worried that I may be obsessed with her and any time she hears a noise in her house she is.....purified? Oh, wait: petrified. Sorry, it's not easy reading a diary through binoculars from a tree.
I got into the house tonight and there was a lovely smell of a joint roasting.
Candles were lit, there was some chillout music playing and a bottle of wine was on the coffee table with two glasses.
I smiled and went into the kitchen, where she had her back to me.
I watched her for a while, the woman of my dreams; she was wearing a short sleeveless dress, her hair tied back exposing a beautiful neck, and she hummed as she chopped vegetables.
I realised then how much I loved her.
"Hi, babe," I said.
She screamed and dropped the knife. "Who the fuck are you and how did you get in?!"