I slipped into an uneasy sleep this Christmas Eve, worrying about my cancelled appointment at the clinic.
Midway through the night, I was paid a visit by the ghost of Christmas Past. "You have made many mistakes in your life," he said and showed me all the bad I had done in my life. I pretended to care.
Sleep followed until I was awoken again by the ghost of Christmas Present. He proceeded to show me my life as a lonely batchelor - strip clubs, endless women, plenty of cash. Yeah, ask me if I'm unhappy, I thought.
"I am the last visitor this evening," he concluded. "Think carefully about what you have witnessed."
"Hang on," I said, "What about the ghost of Christmas Future?"
"Ah," he replied, "The future, yes. He said there was no point. Something about results from a clinic appointment?"
I met a girl in a club on the weekend, I gave her my number and she called me the next day. She said to me "come back to my house there is no-one there". So I went to her house, knocked on the door and guess what-There was no fucker there!!