Similar Jokes

I paid a hundred quid to join one of those fuck buddy dating sites, it's a bit of a lottery as most of the woman don't show their face.

When my date arrived it turns out it was my wife "Oh for fucks sake," I shouted "You didn't pay a hundred quid as well?"
My wife was moaning this evening about all the weight she's going to put on over Christmas.

"If I put on any more, I'll have to call myself a BBW," she said.

"Oh god, you'll never be one of those," I said.

"Really? You don't think I'll be that big?"

"Of course you will," I said, "I just meant you'll never be beautiful."
I met a girl on one of those online dating websites and took her out for a date last night. I specifically remembered that she had written in her profile, "I just love guys who can take me out on a night I'll never forget ;)".

So I raped her.