My mate told me that I just don't understand irony.
Which was ironic because we were at a bus stop at the time.
I rolled over to my wife in bed and asked, "Do you fancy a chilean miner?"
"It's where you go down my shaft and I come out a lot earlier than expected."
Tonight I'll be watching terrified minors going up and down a shaft all night.
Might even have a quick look at how this Chile thing pans out when I'm done with my porn.
The cricket starts today, England v Pakistan.
One country riddled with radical islamic terrorists, crime, violence, and is full of pakis... And today they face Pakistan.
The 26th of December is going to be an awkward day in the Audley Harrison household...