I've just had the worst case of 'Beer Goggles'....
I went back home after a night out and shagged the wife.
After 5 years of training I was sure my gruesome looking pitbull was ready for a dog fight....my wife didnt agree but I pushed her in the ring anyway.
My wife and I after a long discussion decided that we needed to try something different after 15 years of marriage. She has changed her job and Im now fucking her sister.
Ive just returned from taking my wife to the hospital in an emergency but all is well thank god....her funeral is next Thursday.
I had an eye test today and the optician had bad news. " It would seem your eyes have deteriorated since your last test and I would recommend that you have glasses. " " No thanks", I said. " My wife looks shit as it is. "