Hottest This Month

The UK Government has said that Scotland could end up as a Third World country if they vote for independence.

I don't know if things will improve to that extent, but you never know.
I was watching the news this morning when the presenter said;

"A man has been arrested after half a million indecent images of children were found at his home in Bradford. Our reporter Gary O'Donoghue has more."

Gary, you filthy bastard!!
I heard a funny noise whilst in bed last night so I jumped up and did all the usual stuff - checked the front door, checked the windows, shot my girlfriend five times, checked the back door.

Turns out there was no one there!
What do black guys have that's longer than most white men's and gets even bigger when they touch a woman?

Their criminal record.