Hottest This Week
A Muslim schoolgirl is complaining that she has been excluded from her Camden school for wearing a veil.
Ironically, if she lived in a Muslim country she could wear a veil to her heart's content, she just wouldn't be allowed to go to school.
So the US is to send 3,000 troops to help combat Ebola.
Does anyone else get the feeling they don't know what Ebola is?
The boss of Dulux paints has died of hypothermia while trekking across the Antarctic.
Medics say he needed a second coat.
Is that a banana in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?
Neither, it's my new iPhone.
It's certainly been a bad week for fruit.
Blackberry's handset sales are down even further, Jason Orange leaves Take That, Apple's latest iPhone update goes pear shaped, and a giant plum forgets part of his speech at the Labour Party Conference.
A Post Office employee in Bournemouth is retiring after 41 years without using any of her sick days.
Friends describe her as "dedicated".
Co-workers remember her as, "That cow who kept giving me the flu."
57% of the British public back military air strikes against IS targets in Syria and Iraq.
The other 43% of the British public are Muslim.
I was awoken early by two coppers knocking on my door, they said "There's been a serious crime in the area and we are just looking for leads."
I replied "It's near Bradford, now fuck-off you pair of cunts!"
A halal only branch of KFC in Birmingham has refused to supply wet wipes. The Daily Mail report this to be due to the alcohol content but a restaurant spokesman refuted this.
"Wet wipes constitute a wash and that is banned by Islam," he said.
Americans: "You cannot change the 2nd Amendment"
Do they even know what amendment actually means?! 33