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After weeks of online chatting, I arranged to meet Clare, the undercover police woman.

Imagine my shock when she turned out to be a nine-year-old boy.
My speed date asked me if I was into conspiracy theories.
"Well, so-so," I replied
"That's a pity," she responded. "I couldn't sleep with a man who didn't love them. Second question, who is your favourite Royal?"
"Prince Trevor," I said. "He's the one they don't talk about."
Saying a woman wearing a skimpy outfit is "asking for it" is like saying a guy walking around in a football top wouldn't mind getting tackled out of nowhere.
Police are investigating an episode of 'Bargain Hunt' filmed in Liverpool after both teams got their 3 items without spending any of their £300 budget.