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Daily Mail: "Child rapist who bribed his victim with VIP tickets for a One Direction concert is jailed for 18 years"

Hopefully he will get extra for the rape.
A black man walks into a petrol station and says to the cashier, "Gimme all the money in the till or I'll blow you away!"

The cashier says, "But you haven't got a gun!"

The black man says, "Sorry, force of habit. Pump number four, please."