Hottest Today

I was telling my colleague at work that since my wife died I've lost so much weight.

"Missing the home cooking?" he sympathised.

"No," I replied. "I just skip everywhere."
If you don't have a TV licence, you could get sent to prison.....Where you can watch TV all day, without needing a licence.
A grand jury has decided not to indict Ferguson Police Officer Darren Wilson for killing 18-year-old Michael Brown.

Ferguson protesters have declared remembrance for their fallen brother will, as is usual in these cases, take the form of 48 hours violent looting.
I phoned my wife earlier. "I'm just setting off from work, do you want me to pick up fish and chips on my way home?"

It was met with a stony silence. I think she still regrets letting me name the twins.
The niggers in Ferguson are rioting, looting and burning the town to protest against the way the police treat "law abiding citizens".

They don't help themselves do they?