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I was showing an American colleague who was over on a business conference the sights.

"Wow," he said. "I can't believe how small and compact everything is. Your cars, your buildings, your TV's, and even your food portions."

Then I introduced him to my wife. That shut him up.
A recent telephone conversation with my wife turned into an argument. She called me a "stupid cunt", so I slammed the phone down.

Which kind of proved her point, because I cracked the screen on my iPhone.
Phil Collins has said since he's stopped playing drums and making records he's often too depressed to get out of bed in the morning. Ironic, as that's exactly the effect he had on me when he was playing drums and making records
The Government have announced from the 1st October 2014 motorists are no longer required to display a tax disc in their vehicles.

A spokesman for motorists groups in Liverpool said : "This is nothing new, we started the trend in 1956"