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Muslims claim that they are the true faith, and that everyone since Adam was a muslim.


But can they explain why Noah brought pigs onto the Ark?
After 1300 years of praying five times a day you would think that Muslims would have eventually realised that the carpets are not going to take off, and fly.
'Those people who say All boys are the same' oh, yeah because Gok Wan, Hitler and Eminem have loads in common.
After I pulled this girl and took her home, I left her on the couch while I made some 'preparations':

"I'm sorry for keeping you" I said when I joined her.

"You've not been that long" she replied.

"You've misunderstood," I said, "I mean you're not leaving."
I was listening to my son saying his prayers last night and I thought he'd gone soft in the head as he said "Dear god all I want is a cure for ebola to be found soon"
I was just about to give him a slap when he continued "and please make it involve lots of bacon and alcohol".

that's my boy!