Hottest Jokes Today
The inventor of the disappointing punchline has died.
His funeral will be held on Tuesday at 2pm.
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I went to a posh restaurant today where I was greeted by a black man. "May I take your coat, sir?" he asked.
How refreshing, I thought to myself...
A thief with manners.
"...but whatever you do, just make sure you keep them away from water."
"No, Whitney Houston's family."
A Doncaster man has appeared in court after allegedly having sex with a Shetland pony.
And I'm thinking: How sick, perverted and depraved do you have to be to have sex with a man from Doncaster?
I invented the sandal for people with one leg.
It was a flop.
The inventor of disappearing ink has died.
In his will he wrote, "
My wife only lets me watch Match Of The Day if I make her come.
Is David Coleman still on it?
Gary Lineker not paying taxes has left a sour cream & chive taste in my mouth
I had a terrible dream about me going to the fridge and it being empty. I woke up screaming and ran to the fridge. I felt a great relief when I opened it and my daughter was still in there.
I got chatting to a bird in a club she said, "I'm sick of men agreeing with everything I say just 'cause I've got big tits."
I said, "Yeah, I hate that." Click Here For More From Today