Aye-Same has a score of 1968 at the moment.
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The best of Aye-Same's 20 jokes (View All)
| Two fish are in a tank One turns to the other and says: 'How the fuck do you drive this?' |    |
Joke by Aye-same, in Jokes with no home > Animals - Tagged fish , animals - Current Score: 274 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| A White, a Black and an Indian are walking along the beach when they find a magic lamp. Quick as a flash, out pops a Genie. "Ah, you have freed me," says the Genie. "I will grant you each one wish to show my gratitude." The Indian says, "I wish all the Indians were home in India living happy lives." Poof! He dissapears. The Black says, "I wish all the Blacks were home in Africa living happy lives." Poof! he dissapears. Then the White turns to the Genie and says, "so you're telling me there are no Blacks or Indians in the country?" "Yes, I suppose so," replies the Genie. The White says, "well, I'll just have some champagne then." | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Religion and racism > Nigger - Tagged racism , black , indian , genie - Current Score: 188 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| An old guy walks into a new pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads: #1 CHEESEBURGER: £1.50 #2 CHICKEN SANDWICH : £2.50 #3 HANDJOB: £10.00 Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive women serving drinks to a meager looking group of men. "Yes?" she inquires with a knowing smile, "can I help you?" "I was wondering", whispers the man, "are you the one who gives the handjobs?" "Yes", she purrs, "I am." The man replies, "Well wash your hands, I want a cheeseburger." | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged cheeseburger , handjob - Current Score: 173 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| Little Tommy on a farm runs indoors "Mummy! Mummy! The bull's fucking the cow!" His mum says "No Tommy, you must be polite and say 'the bull is surprising the cow'". Later on Tommy runs in again. "Mummy! Mummy! The bull's surprising all the cows!" His mum says "No Tommy, the bull can't be surprising all the cows". Tommy replies "Oh yes he can; He's fucking the horse!" | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Jokes with no home > Animals - Tagged gay , fucker - Current Score: 156 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| A man is walking in London, when it suddenly starts raining so he takes shelter in a peek-a-boo sex shop and pays £50 to get in. He's then confronted by 3 doors. They read "Blonde", "Brunette" and "Black". He chooses "Blonde", only to be confronted by 3 more doors reading "Small Tits", "Medium Tits" or "Big Tits". This time he chooses "Big Tits" only to be again confronted with 3 more doors reading "Small Cunt", "Large Cunt", "Wet Cunt". Somewhat excited now, he chooses "Wet Cunt", pushes his way through the door, and finds himself back out in the rain. | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Sex and shit > Sex Shop - Tagged man , sex shop , rain - Current Score: 130 - Added: 9 months ago
| A Catholic bishop went to Rome and was determined to meet the Pope. He went to St Peter's square and stood at the front of the crowd. He was fortunate enough to see the Pope leaving the Basilica so he tried to attract his attention. The Pope however, stopped just short of him and spoke quietly to a dishevelled and disgusting old tramp before moving on, ignoring the bishop. Now the bishop thought that the Pope must be a good and caring man who would go out of his way for the poor and down trodden. So the bishop asked the tramp to sell him his rags which he wore the next day in St Peter's square. The bishop was fortunate enough to see the Pope again and this time the Pope put his arm round the bishop's shoulder and said "Didn't I tell you to fuck off yesterday!" | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Religion and racism > Catholicism - Tagged pope , catholic - Current Score: 125 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| The Greek god Zeus was flying over a Greek island and noticed a naked woman washing herself, so he swooped down and made love to her. Then he said, "In 9 months you shall have a child and you shall call him Hercules!" And the woman replied "In 9 days you shall have a rash and you shall call it herpes." | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Religion and racism > Greek - Tagged greek , zeus , poor joke - Current Score: 94 - Added: 9 months ago
| Woman: "Help, help, an Irishman tried to rape me!" Cop: "How do you know he was Irish?" Woman: "I had to help him." | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Religion and racism > Irish - Tagged irish , rape - Current Score: 87 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| A man is walking along and sees a blonde sat on the edge of a cliff. "Are you going to jump?" He asks. "Yeah, I am," The blonde replies. "Well, before you do, will you give me a blowjob?" He says. The blonde agrees, then proceeds to give him the best blowjob he's ever had. "Wow! With talent like that, why would you want to waste it?" He asks . The Blonde Replies: "Because my family just can't cope with me dressing as a woman." | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Celebrity and news events > viagra - Tagged blowjob - Current Score: 56 - Added: 8 months ago
| How do you get a sweet little 80-year-old lady to say "Fuck"? Get another sweet little 80-year-old lady to shout "BINGO!" | |
Joke by Aye-same, in Illness and mortality > Old people - Tagged old ladie , bingo - Current Score: 37 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
Custurd spent 11.8ms doing 16 queries and 0.24s processing. She's 39.89% angry.
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