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The best of NOVACASTRIAN's 4 jokes (View All)
| A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, 'If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes, The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, 'Thank you, but i failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes, Whatever you wish for, your husband will get times ten!' The woman said, 'That's okay.' For her first wish, she wanted to be the most beautiful woman in the world. The frog warned her, 'You do realize that this wish will also make your husband the most handsome man in the world, an Adonis whom women will flock to'. The woman replied, 'That's okay, because I will be the most beautiful Woman and he will have eyes only for me.' So, KAZAM-she's the most beautiful Woman in the world! For her second wish, she wanted to be the richest woman in the world. The frog said, 'That will make your husband the richest man in the world. And he will be ten times richer than you.' The woman said, 'That's okay, because what's mine is his and what's his is mine.' So, KAZAM-she's the richest woman in the world! The frog then inquired about her third wish, and she answered,'I'd like a mild heart attack.' Moral of the story: Women are clever. Don't mess with them! ATTENTION: female readers : This is the end of the joke for you. Stop here and continue feeling good. Male readers : Please scroll down. ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^ The man had a heart attack ten times milder than his wife. Moral of the story : Women are really dumb but think they're really smart. Let them continue to think that way and just enjoy the show. PS: If you are a woman and are still reading this; it only goes to show that women never listen...now run along and put the kettle on, there's a love. X X X |    |
Joke by NOVACASTRIAN, in Sex and shit > Marriage - Tagged women , sexist , male - Current Score: 123 - Added: 8 months, 7 days ago
| A Sky Sports poll has named Joe Kinnear the second worst caretaker appointment ever. Ian huntley was first. | |
Joke by NOVACASTRIAN, in Celebrity and news events > Newcastle United - Tagged toon , football , ian huntley - Current Score: 85 - Added: 1 week ago
| Baby Bear goes downstairs and sits in his small chair at the table, he looks into his small bowl. It is empty. 'who's been eating my porridge?!!', he squeaks. Papa Bear arrives at the big table and sits in his big chair.He looks into his big bowl,and it is also empty. ' Who's been eating my Porridge?!!,' he roars. Momma Bear puts her head through the serving hatch from the kitchen and yells, 'For Christ's sake, how many times do we have to go through this with you idiots? It was Momma Bear who got up first, it was Momma Bear who woke everyone in the house, it was Momma Bear who made the coffee, it was Momma Bear who unloaded the dishwasher from last night, and put everything away, it was Momma Bear who went out in the cold early morning air to fetch the newspaper, it was Momma Bear who set the damn table, it was Momma Bear who put the friggin cat out, cleaned the litter box, and filled the cat's water and food dish, and, now that you've decided to drag your sorry bear-asses downstairs, and grace Momma Bear's kitchen with your grumpy presence, listen good, cause I'm only going to say this one more time: 'I HAVEN'T MADE THE FUCKING PORRIDGE YET!! | |
Joke by NOVACASTRIAN, in Jokes with no home > Accident - Tagged porridge , bears - Current Score: 12 - Added: 4 months, 15 days ago
| JOSEF FRITZL LTD. Cellar convertions and soundproofing specialist, a family business established 25 years! | |
Joke by NOVACASTRIAN, in Celebrity and news events > Josef Fritzl - Tagged austrian , sausage fingered , nonce! - Current Score: 3 - Added: 5 months, 7 days ago
Custurd spent 0.06ms doing 10 queries and -0.02s processing. She's 0.05% angry.
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