cj-underhill has a score of 824 at the moment.
The score reflects joke quality and moderation rewards.
Send cj-underhill a message
The best of cj-underhill's 8 jokes (View All)
| I Raped a Virgin and All I Got Was This Bloody T-Shirt |    |
Joke by cj-underhill, in Sex and shit > Rape - Tagged rape , virgin , t-shirt , blood - Current Score: 428 - Added: 4 months, 19 days ago
| What with Lewis Hamilton winning the F1 world championship and Barack Obama being president of the USA, it has never been cooler to be black. Bet Michael Jackson is pissed off now | |
Joke by cj-underhill, in Celebrity and news events > Michael Jackson - Tagged lewis hamilton , barack obama , black , michael jackson - Current Score: 253 - Added: 1 week ago
| Paddy and Mick are in jail, Mick looks through the bars of Paddy's cell to see him hanging by his feet Mick: Paddy,what are you doing? Paddy : I'm trying to hang myself Mick: Surely the rope should be around your neck Paddy? Paddy: I tried that Mick, but i couldn't breathe. | |
Joke by cj-underhill, in Religion and racism > Irish - Tagged paddy mick irish - Current Score: 78 - Added: 7 months, 13 days ago
| A woman rings her dad who has just gone into a nursing home and ask him how he is getting on. "I love it " he said, "I woke up this morning with an erection and the most beautiful nurse said she would sort it out for me and gave me the best hand job I have ever had!" Two days later the old man rings his daughter and tells her he is coming home. "Why? I thought you loved it there?" she said. "I did,but I fell over this morning and one of them gay male nurses slipped his cock in me and gave me a right rodgering, I'm coming home" "Well," said his daughter, "you have to take the good with the bad, you get a great hand job when you get an erection so the price you pay for it is an arse rodgering from the gay nurse, it's only fair" she said. "No it fucking isn't, I get an erection twice a year, but I fucking fall over 7 times a day" | |
Joke by cj-underhill, in Sex and shit > Old - Tagged dad , erection , arse , fucking - Current Score: 21 - Added: 5 months, 9 days ago
| Sadly, Richard was born without any ears, and though he proved to be successful in business, his problem annoyed him greatly. One day he needed to hire a new manager for his company, so he set up three interviews. The first guy was great. He knew everything he needed to know and was very interesting. But at the end of the interview, Richard asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?" "Why, yes, I couldn't help but notice that you have no ears," came the reply. Richard did not appreciate his candour and threw him out of the office. The second interview was with a woman, and she was even better than the first guy. But he asked her the same question: "Do you notice anything different about me?" "Well," she said stammering, "you have no ears." Richard again got upset and chucked her out in a rage. The third and final interviewee was the best of the bunch, he was a young man who had recently earned his MBA. He was smart. He was handsome, and he seemed to be a better businessman that the first two put together. Richard was anxious, but went ahead and asked the young man the same question: "Do you notice anything different about me?" Much to his surprise, the young man answered, "Yes, you wear contact lenses, don't you?" Richard was shocked and realised this was an incredibly observant person. "How in the world did you know that?", he asked. The young man replied, "Well, it's pretty hard to wear glasses with no fucking ears!" | |
Joke by cj-underhill, in Jokes with no home > Accident - Tagged glasses , ears , contact lenses , interview , job - Current Score: 20 - Added: 7 months, 9 days ago
| I saw six men kicking and punching the mother-in-law. My neighbour said ' Are you going to help?'. No i said, 6 should be enough | |
Joke by cj-underhill, in Jokes with no home > Mother-In-Law - Tagged more old than the great queen mum - Current Score: 12 - Added: 7 months, 11 days ago
| I suffer from Alzheimer's and deja vu at the same time.........I'm sure I've forgotton this before. | |
Joke by cj-underhill, in Illness and mortality > Alzheimers - Tagged alzheimers , deja vu - Current Score: 10 - Added: 7 months, 11 days ago
cj-underhill got buried to -6. Reveal Joke
Custurd spent 0.34ms doing 14 queries and -0.13s processing. She's 1.68% angry.
Sickipedia v2.7 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel