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co2 has a score of 765 at the moment.
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The best of co2's 4 jokes (View All)

A man takes his nine year old daughter to the doctor. After several hours in the waiting room, (NHS...) they're called in.
"Hello," the doctor says. "How can I help you?"
The man nods, "It's my daughter, I was wondering if you could put her on birth control."
"Birth control?" the doctor is incredulous. "She's too young to be sexually active!"
"Sexually active?" the father says, "She just lies there like her mother!"
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Joke by co2, in Sex and shit > Incest - Tagged incest , paedophilia , sex , daughter , chemist , birth control , condom , paedophile , josef , fritzl , austria  - Current Score: 422 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago

Joe wanted to buy a motorbike. He doesn't have much luck until, one day, he comes across a Harley with a 'for sale' sign on it.

The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It is shiny and in absolute mint condition.

He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years.

"Well, it's quite simple, really," says the seller, "whenever the bike is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain." And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.

That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there. Just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, "I have to tell you something about my family before we go in. When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes."

"No problem," he says. And in they go.

Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes.

They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word.

As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation and leans over and kisses Sandra.

No one says a word.

So he reaches over and fondles her breasts.

Still, nobody says a word.

So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table, and screws her right there, in front of her parents.

His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mom horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.

He looks at her mom. "She's got a great body," he thinks. So he grabs the mom, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which way right there on the dinner table. Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total silence.

All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder and it starts to rain.

Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket. Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts, "All right, that's enough, I'll do the fucking dishes!"
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Joke by co2, in Sex and shit > Gay - Tagged vaseline  - Current Score: 282 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago

Vanessa Feltz was arrested at Heathrow for drug smuggling.

They looked up her skirt and found 300 pounds of crack.
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Joke by co2, in Celebrity and news events > Vanessa Feltz - Tagged drugs , fat , vanessa feltz  - Current Score: 55 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago

How many men does it take to change a lightbulb?

None - let the bitch cook in the dark!
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Joke by co2, in Sex and shit > Women - Tagged 69  - Current Score: 6 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago

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