dancer1625 has a score of 67 at the moment.
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The best of dancer1625's 2 jokes (View All)
| As a butcher is shooing a dog from his shop, he sees a £10 note in the dog's mouth and a note reading "10 lamb chops, please." Amazed, the butcher takes the money, puts a bag of chops in the dog's mouth and quickly closes the shop. He follows the dog and watches him wait for a green light, look both ways, and trot across the road to a bus stop. The dog checks the time table and sits on the bench. When a bus arrives, he walks around to the front and looks at the number, then boards the bus. The butcher follows, dumbstruck. As the bus travels out into the suburbs, the dog takes in the scenery. After awhile he stands on his back paws to push the "stop" button, then the butcher follows him off. The dog runs up to a house and drops his bag on the porch. He goes back down the path, takes a big run, and throws himself -Whap!- against the door. He does this again and again. No answer. So he jumps on a wall, walks around the garden, beats his head against a window, jumps off, and waits at the front door. A big guy opens it and starts cursing and pummelling the dog. The butcher runs up screams at the guy: "What the hell are you doing? This dog's a genius!" The owner responds, "Genius my arse, this is the second time this week he's forgotten his key!" |    |
Joke by dancer1625, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged dog , butcher , shopping - Current Score: 54 - Added: 7 months, 28 days ago
| The only cow in a small Cheshire town stopped giving milk. The people did some research and found that they could buy a cow just across the county line in Staffordshire for £200. They bought the cow from Staffordshire and the cow was wonderful. It produced lots of milk all of the time, and the people were pleased and very happy. They decided to acquire a bull to mate with the cow to produce more cows like it. They would never have to worry about their milk supply again. They bought the bull and put it in the pasture with their beloved cow. However, whenever the bull came close to the cow, the cow would move away. No matter what approach the bull tried, the cow would move away from the bull and he could not succeed in his quest. The people were very upset and decided to ask the Vet, who was very wise, what to do. They told the Vet what was happening. "Whenever the bull approaches our cow, she moves away. If he approaches from the back, she moves forward. When he approaches her from the front, she backs off. An approach from the side, she walks away to the other side." The Vet thought about this for a minute and asked, "Did you by chance, buy this cow in Staffordshire?" The people were dumbfounded, since no one had ever mentioned where they bought the cow. "You are truly a wise Vet," they said. "How did you know we got the cow in Staffordshire?" The Vet replied with a distant look in his eye, "My wife is from Staffordshire." | |
Joke by dancer1625, in Jokes with no home > Farming - Tagged cow , bull , vet , staffordshire - Current Score: 11 - Added: 7 months, 28 days ago
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