| User Level: | User | ||
| Contribution Points: | 14 | Total Joke Score: | 15,785 |
| Country: |
United kingdom 
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Total Time Active: | 26 hours, 22 minutes |
| Total Jokes Submitted: | 243 | Live Jokes: | 108 |
| Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): | 135 | Duplicate Jokes: | 32 |
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The best of ferret's 108 jokes (View All)
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I have an idea to lower teenage pregnancy rates in the UK. Replace the current sex education in our schools with porn. It would mean the girls would accept anal as the norm and the boys would know to pull out and come on the girl's tits. |
 
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Joke submitted by ferret, originally by 'Jim Jeffries'. in Sex and shit - Teenage Pregnancy - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
- Current Score: 1069.2
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I hate double standards. Like if a girl goes out and sleeps with loads of guys she's considered a "slut". Yet if a guy does it...he's considered a "homosexual". |
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Joke by ferret in Sex and shit - Slut - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
- Current Score: 905.2
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After hearing that Prince Harry was caught on camera saying, "Ah, our little Paki friend.. Ahmed", Prince Philip has released a statement saying that he is ashamed and disappointed by his grandson's behaviour. He couldn't believe that he called the little Paki bastard his friend. |
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Joke by ferret in Celebrities - Prince Harry - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
- Current Score: 797
| Have you ever tried to play the Chinese version of the board game, "Guess who?" It's fucking impossible, they all looked the same. |
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One time, my girlfriend and I did it doggy style for half an hour! ...or four minutes human time |
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Joke by ferret in Sex and shit - Sexual Positions - Added: 11 months ago
- Current Score: 610
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I found the girl of my dreams, yesterday, whilst in the vegetable section in Tesco's. Although, they don't like you calling it the vegetable section anymore, do they? It's 'disabled toilets' these days. |
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Joke by ferret in Illness and mortality - Disability - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
- Current Score: 563.4
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I got in a fight with this guy last night and he said to me, "Yeah? Well I fucked your mum!" I've never really understood that as an insult. My mum's 68...he was about 22. Sounds to me like a pretty good result for mum. |
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Joke by ferret in Sex and shit - MILF - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
- Current Score: 523.6
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I just broke up with this cross-eyed chick. I thought she was seeing someone else. |
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Joke by ferret in Illness and mortality - ??? General - Added: 11 months ago
- Current Score: 517.2
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My friend recently got divorced from his wife. He told me, "Marriage is like a prison." I thought to myself, "That’s not true. At least in prison you get to have anal sex." |
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I can understand why Muslims are so highly motivated to carry out terrorist attacks, they are promised 72 virgins when they go to heaven. A fine reward, I'm sure we'll all agree.
But for those virgins... heaven isn't exactly what they expected is it? "You be a good little girl, you must always wear a burka, you must always wear a veil. You may not go to school, you may not get a job, you may not learn to read, you may not vote, drive, dance, play games or listen to [...] |
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