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The best of garrygwizz's 25 jokes (View All)
| You know that signs that say, "GUIDE DOGS ONLY", well who is it directed at? The dog? |    |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Illness and mortality > Blindness - Tagged blind - Current Score: 177 - Added: 3 months ago
| Paddy takes his new wife home on his wedding night. She lies on the bed, spread-eagled, naked, and says, "Paddy....you know what I want....." "Yeah....the whole fucking bed by the looks of it!" | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged paddy , sex , irish , wedding - Current Score: 142 - Added: 3 months ago
| Look on the bright side....the advert says that the burmese kids had to walk 12 miles every day to get water.....now they can have a lie-in!---- | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Celebrity and news events > Burma - Tagged burma , kids , flood - Current Score: 134 - Added: 3 months ago
| My wife brought some ky jelly home and said, "This is going to make you happy tonight!" She was fucking right as well......I spread it all over the door knobs and she couldn't get back in! | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Sex and shit > Kinky - Tagged sex , jelly , wife , tonight - Current Score: 105 - Added: 3 months ago
| NEWSFLASH! The Irish goverment have announced that, as of next week, all cars in Ireland will now drive on the right hand side of the road. If this is a success, all buses and lorries will follow a week later. | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Religion and racism > Irish - Tagged 2008 - Current Score: 104 - Added: 3 months ago
| The Judge looked at the jury in disbelief, "How could you possibly find this man not guilty"? he asked "Insanity your honour" "What......all fucking 12 of you"? | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Jokes with no home > Political Correctness - Tagged insanity , judge , fuck - Current Score: 72 - Added: 3 months ago
| A copper stopped me and gave me a speeding ticket. "What am I supposed to do with this fucking thing?" I shouted. "Keep it.......when you collect four you get a bicycle," he said. | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Religion and racism > police - Tagged police , speeding - Current Score: 66 - Added: 3 months ago
| Man goes to a doctor and says: "Doctor, my wife recently has lost her voice. What should I do to help her get it back?" The doctor replies, "Try coming home at 3 in the morning!" | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged sex , wife , voice - Current Score: 62 - Added: 3 months ago
| Bought my wife one of those new coats made out of hamster fur.........it looks great, but it took me 4 hours to get her off the Ferris Wheel in Blackpool. | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged hamster , ferris , wife , coat - Current Score: 23 - Added: 1 month ago
| Paddy walks into The Antiques Roadshow and puts a fucking big box on the table. "Where did you find this?" asked the expert. "Oh, it's been in the attic for years," said Paddy. "Have you got insurance?" asked the expert. "Why do you ask?" said Paddy. "Because you're going to need it - that's your cold water tank." | |
Joke by garrygwizz, in Religion and racism > Irish - Tagged paddy , tank , roadshow - Current Score: 23 - Added: 1 month ago
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