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The best of hellionfuck's 3 jokes (View All)
| A young man asked an old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1932. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel." "I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple and, at the end of the day, I sold the apple for ten cents." "The next morning, I invested those ten cents in two apples. I spent the entire day polishing them and sold them at 5:00 pm for 20 cents. I continued this system for a month, by the end of which I'd accumulated a fortune of $1.37." "Then my wife's father died and left us two million dollars." |    |
Joke by hellionfuck, in Illness and mortality > Dead - Tagged death - Current Score: 66 - Added: 8 months, 7 days ago
| Once there was a beautiful woman who loved to work in her vegetable garden, but no matter what she did, she couldn't get her tomatoes to ripen. Admiring her neighbor's garden, which had beautiful bright red tomatoes, she went one day and inquired of him his secret. "It's really quite simple," the old man explained. "Twice each day, in the morning and in the evening, I expose myself in front of the tomatoes and they turn red with embarrassment." Desperate for the perfect garden, she tried his advice and proceeded to expose herself to her plants twice daily. Two weeks passed and her neighbor stopped by to check her progress. "So," he asked, "Any luck with your tomatoes?" "No," she replied excitedly. "But you should see the size of my cucumbers!" | |
Joke by hellionfuck, in Sex and shit > Penis - Tagged man , woman , tomatoes , cucumbers , penis , erection , strip - Current Score: 48 - Added: 8 months, 8 days ago
| A young man was in town looking for a little something from the ladies. A cab driver gave him an address and told him he could find anything he wanted there. When the young man arrived, he saw a door with a small panel on it. He knocked and the panel slid open. A female voice asked what he wanted. "I want to get screwed," said the man. "OK, but this is a private club. Slide twenty bucks in the slot as an initiation fee," answered the voice. The man slid twenty dollars in the slot, the panel closed, and ten minutes passed. Nothing happened. He began to pound on the door, and the panel slid open. "Hey," exclaimed the man, "I want to get screwed!" "What?" said the voice, "Again?" | |
Joke by hellionfuck, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged man , dollar , screw , private , town - Current Score: 29 - Added: 8 months, 8 days ago
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