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iKarp's Statistics

User Level: User
Contribution Points: 2 Total Joke Score: 784
Country: United kingdom GB Total Time Active: 3 hours, 6 minutes
Total Jokes Submitted: 25 Live Jokes: 9
Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): 16 Duplicate Jokes: 7


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The best of iKarp's 9 jokes (View All)
What's the difference between God and Bono?

God doesn't wander around Dublin thinking he's Bono.
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Joke by iKarp in Racism - Irish - Added: 2 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 486.2

My girlfriend never warned me about the ceiling mirror in her room.
I lay down down ready for her, then ran out the room screaming.

I looked up and thought I was being attacked by a naked skydiver.
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Joke by iKarp in Sex and shit - Surprise - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago - Current Score: 111

Two little children are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other outside the operating room---the first surgeries of the day.

The first child leans over and asks, 'What are you in here for?'

The second child says, 'I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous.'

The first child says, 'You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jelly and Ice C [...]

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Joke by iKarp in Other - Children - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago - Current Score: 49

A blonde goes into an ice-cream shop and asks for a single chocolate scoop. The clerk says "we've just run out of chocolate, but for the inconvenience, we'll give you another scoop of a different flavour for free."

The blonde thinks for a moment, and asks again for chocolate.
The clerk sighs and says "spell VAN in Vanilla."

"V-A-N" The blonde answers proudly.

"Spell STRAW in Strawberry" The clerk says.[...]

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Joke by iKarp in Sex and shit - Viagra - Added: 2 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 32

What's a crick?

The sound a Japanese camera makes.
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Joke by iKarp in Racism - Japanese - Added: 1 year ago - Current Score: 31

I see the French have launched their own version of Google.

Just type in any subject you're interested in and, part way through the search, it'll give up.
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Joke by iKarp in Racism - French - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago - Current Score: 30

Be safety conscious: 80% of people are caused by accidents. I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by iKarp in Celebrities - Barack Obama - Added: 2 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 19.2

Y'know that part in the wedding where you say, "'Til death do us part"?

You'll realise later on you're actually setting a goal.

I'm jealous.

It seemed so fucking easy for Jack.
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Joke by iKarp in Celebrities - Jack Tweed - Added: 1 year ago - Current Score: 14

Wendy Richards died and they've shown the highlights of her career on the news.

Good luck doing that when Jade finally goes.
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Joke by iKarp in Celebrities - Jade Goody - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago - Current Score: 12

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