manning79 has a score of 554 at the moment.
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The best of manning79's 13 jokes (View All)
| Why do women watch porn? To see if the characters get married at the end. |    |
Joke by manning79, in Sex and shit > Pornography - Tagged porn , women , stupid , marriage - Current Score: 59 - Added: 1 year ago
| What's the similarity between Kodak Cameras and Condoms? They are both there to catch those special moments. | |
Joke by manning79, in Sex and shit > Condom - Tagged condoms , cameras - Current Score: 51 - Added: 1 year ago
| At the breakfast table the next morning, the husband puts his head in his hands and groaned loudly, "Oh, bloody hell, what a party last night - I can't remember a thing about it. Did I make a prat of myself ?" "You sure did," replied his wife. "You put your hand up the skirt of the boss's wife and told your boss to piss off." "Shit! What happened?" "He sacked you." "Well fuck him, the bastard." "I did," replied the wife, "and you've got your job back." | |
Joke by manning79, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged job , booze , party - Current Score: 45 - Added: 1 year ago
| It's the last supper, and Jesus says, "Tonight one of you will betray me." He stares at Judas Iscariot. Judas says, "Fuck off Jesus, you always pick on me when you're drunk." | |
Joke by manning79, in Religion and racism > God - Tagged jesus , last supper , judas iscariot , god - Current Score: 45 - Added: 10 months, 24 days ago
| What's a Cops favourite Hand in Poker? Four Clubs beats a Spade. | |
Joke by manning79, in Jokes with no home > Police - Tagged police , blacks , cards , games - Current Score: 38 - Added: 1 year ago
| These two Irishmen went for a job. And the first one goes in and sees the bloke interviewing him has got these two ears, one on his forehead and the other on his chin. He sits down and the fella says, 'Now, do you notice anything at all unusual about me?' So the Irishman says, 'Yeah, you've got these funny ears, look, one's on your forehead and the other one's on your chin.' The fella says, 'You cheeky bastard. How dare you be so insulting. Fuck off out and send the next bloke in.' So he goes out to his mate and says, 'Listen, be careful not to mention his ears. He's a bit sensitive about them.' So the second bloke goes in and the interviewer says, 'Good morning, now before we start, do you notice anything at all unusual about me?' So the fella says, 'No.' 'Are you absolutely sure?' He says. 'Well, sir, I can see you wear contact lenses.' 'How on earth can you tell that?' the bloke asks. 'Well, you'd never get a pair of spectacles to fit over them fuckin' ears.' | |
Joke by manning79, in Jokes with no home > Job - Tagged job interview , glasses , ears , contact lenses - Current Score: 30 - Added: 11 months ago
| How long is a hair on a rabbit's back? About 10 minutes. | |
Joke by manning79, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged rabbit , hair , minutes , back - Current Score: 29 - Added: 10 months, 22 days ago
| A fella in court for pushing a Paki of the top of Blackpool Tower. The Judge says to him, "You bastard! You'll hang for this!" He said: "I did it in a fit of temper your honour. The Judge said: "It makes no difference you could have hit someone on the head." | |
Joke by manning79, in Religion and racism > Pakistani - Tagged court , judge , paki , blackpool tower - Current Score: 28 - Added: 1 year ago
| What's the fastest animal alive? An Ethiopian chicken. | |
Joke by manning79, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged animals , chicken - Current Score: 23 - Added: 1 year ago
| I'll tell you a fact now, 1898, an Irishman invented the toilet seat. 1899, an Englishman put a hole in it. | |
Joke by manning79, in Jokes with no home > Toilet - Tagged irishman , englishman , toilet , toilet seat - Current Score: 16 - Added: 1 year ago
Custurd spent 0.05ms doing 16 queries and 0.06s processing. She's 0.44% angry.
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