pd has a score of 146 at the moment.
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The best of pd's 3 jokes (View All)
| A man comes home early from work one day to find his best mate in bed with his wife. Overcome by anger, he stabs him to death. The wife, shaking her head, looks at him and says, "Keep that up and, pretty soon, you'll have no friends left!" |    |
Joke by pd, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged sex , violence , stab , wife , friends - Current Score: 68 - Added: 4 months, 10 days ago
| A young Jackaroo from outback Australia goes off to university. As these things go, halfway through the semester he has foolishly has squandered all of his money. So he calls home. "Dad," he says, "you won't believe what modern education is developing. They actually have a program here in Brisbane that will teach our dog Ol' Blue how to talk." "That's amazing!" his Dad says. "How do I get Ol' Blue in that program?" "Just send him down here with $2,000," the young Jackaroo says, "I'll get him in the course." So ... his father sends the dog and $2,000. About two-thirds through the semester, the money again runs out. The boy calls home. "So how's Ol' Blue doing, son?" his father wants to know. "Awesome! Dad, he's talking up a storm. But you just won't believe this. They've had such good results with talking, they've begun to teach the animals how to read." "Read?!" exclaims his father. "No kidding! How do we get Ol' Blue in that program?" "Just send $4,500. I'll get him in the class." The money promptly arrives. But our hero has a problem. At the end of the year, his father will find out the dog can neither talk nor read. So he shoots the dog. When he arrives home at the end of the year, his father is all excited. "Where's Ol' Blue? I just can't wait to talk with him, and see him read something!" "Dad," the boy says, "I have some grim news. Yesterday morning, just before we left to drive home, Ol' Blue was in the living room, kicked back in the recliner, reading the Wall Street Journal. Then he suddenly turned to me and asked, 'So, is your daddy still messing around with that little redhead barmaid at the pub?'" The father groans and whispers, "I hope you shot that bastard before he talks to your Mother!" "I sure did, Dad!" "That's my boy!" | |
Joke by pd, in Jokes with no home > Accident - Tagged dog , talk , read - Current Score: 23 - Added: 5 months, 11 days ago
| Little Johnny walks into school one day to find a substitute in place of his regular teacher. She says, "Hello class, I'm Mrs. Prussy. When you say my name class remember it has an "r" after the first letter." The entire class says, "Hello Mrs. Prussy." A few days later the regular teacher is still sick when Little Johnny gets to his desk the teacher asks what her name is. Johnny thinks hard and the says to the teacher, "I remember it has an "r" after the first letter." "That's right!" she coaxed. Then after a few seconds Little Johnny says, "Mrs. Crunt?" | |
Joke by pd, in Sex and shit > Teacher Teacher - Tagged pussy , teacher , johnny - Current Score: 20 - Added: 5 months, 11 days ago
Custurd spent 0.06ms doing 9 queries and -0.02s processing. She's 0.38% angry.
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