pervertedtwat has a score of 136 at the moment.
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The best of pervertedtwat's 4 jokes (View All)
| After the trial the coroner concluded that Henri Paul, Princess Diana's driver, had been under the influence of drugs. He'd used speed and then smack. |    |
Joke by pervertedtwat, in Celebrity and news events > 10 Items Or Less - Tagged princess diana , drugs , crash , speed , smack - Current Score: 60 - Added: 6 months ago
| A vicar is on a train and this pregnant woman gets on and sits down opposite him. As they travel the vicar is reading his newspaper and the woman takes out her knitting. As she is knitting, about every 20 minutes she reaches into her bag and pulls out a bottle of pills from which she takes one and swallows it. This goes on for about an hour when the vicar sees the label "Thalidomide" on the bottle. "Excuse me", says the vicar to the woman, "Do you know the effect that could have on your unborn child?" "Yes" says the woman "I never could knit sleeves." | |
Joke by pervertedtwat, in Illness and mortality > Thalidomide - Tagged knit , sleeves , thalidomide , vicar , train - Current Score: 22 - Added: 6 months ago
| Little Johnny misses a day at school. He comes back the next day and the teacher asks why he was off. "Sorry Miss," he replied, "Daddy got burned" "Oh dear" says the teacher, "I do hope it wasn't serious" "Well Miss, they don't fuck about at the crematorium" | |
Joke by pervertedtwat, in Illness and mortality > A Man Was...... - Tagged cremation , crematorium , little johnny , teacher , burned - Current Score: 11 - Added: 6 months ago
| A black man and an Asian man fall off the roof of a tall building. Who hits the ground first? The Black man, cos the Asian is a shade lighter. | |
Joke by pervertedtwat, in Religion and racism > Aborigines - Tagged merge , black , asian , fall , shade - Current Score: 9 - Added: 6 months ago
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