| User Level: | User | ||
| Contribution Points: | 5 | Total Joke Score: | 2,096 |
| Country: |
United kingdom 
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Total Time Active: | 19 hours, 37 minutes |
| Total Jokes Submitted: | 223 | Live Jokes: | 36 |
| Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): | 187 | Duplicate Jokes: | 51 |
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The best of purespasticated's 36 jokes (View All)
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50% of Americans don't have a passport. It's not that they don't want to leave their country, They're just too fat to fit into a photo booth. |
 
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Joke by purespasticated in Racism - American - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
- Current Score: 469.4
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Recently saw the headline: 'Former Big Brother stars, Where are they now?' Well, I know where one of them is! |
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Joke by purespasticated which requires categorising - Added: 9 months ago
- Current Score: 272.2
| You just know you are in for a shit day when you are sitting in the waiting room of an abortion clinic with your girlfriend and your wife walks in. |
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Joke by purespasticated which requires categorising - Added: 3 months ago
- Current Score: 262
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A guy proposed a one pound bar bet to a full figured girl.
Despite her dress being buttoned to the neck, he bet he could touch her breasts without touching her clothes. Since this didn't seem remotely possible, she was intrigued and accepted the bet. He stepped up, cupped his hands around her breasts and squeezed firmly. With a baffled look, she said, "Hey, you touched my clothes." And he replied: "Okay. I owe y [...] |
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Joke by purespasticated in Sex and shit - Tits - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
- Current Score: 177
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Walked into my bedroom and caught my wife in there having her tits sucked by this young blonde chick. So I stripped and tried to join in! I'm single now,apparently breast-feeding our daughter isn't her idea of a lesbian act, and has no grounds for a threesome! |
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Joke by purespasticated which requires categorising - Added: 9 months ago
- Current Score: 162.6
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When the London transport system was attacked by terrorists, Londoners and tfl were defiant. "We will still get on the buses and trains and we will not be stopped from travelling on the underground," they all said defiantly. "We will not let the terrorists win!" Ya, but 6 inches of snow and you're all fucked!! |
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Joke by purespasticated in Other - Snow - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
- Current Score: 121
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Here's a nice anagram for all you Sickipedians. Sickipedia = I c Pakis die. |
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Joke by purespasticated in Other - Anagrams - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
- Current Score: 86
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Prince Charles was driving around his mother's estate when he accidentally ran over her favorite dog, a Corgi, crushing it to a pulp.
He got out of his Range Rover and sat down on the grass totally distraught. The whole world was against him and now his mother would go ballistic. Suddenly he noticed a lamp half-buried in the ground. He dug it up, polished it and immediately a genie appeared. "You have freed me from thousands of years of imprisonment," said t [...] |
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Joke by purespasticated in Celebrities - Royalty - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
- Current Score: 63
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We all know about Hitler gassing six million Jews. Well, I potentially drowned six million Catholics last night. I had a nice wank in the bath. |
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Joke by purespasticated in Sex and shit - Masturbation - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
- Current Score: 55.2
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Just had an unreal mother and daughter threesome.I feel kinda bad because she was only 15. But fuck it, most mothers are nowadays! |
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Joke by purespasticated which requires categorising - Added: 3 months ago
- Current Score: 54.8
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