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viperuk's Statistics

User Level: User
Contribution Points: 27 Total Joke Score: 2,069
Country: United kingdom GB Total Time Active: 5 hours, 29 minutes
Total Jokes Submitted: 91 Live Jokes: 58
Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): 33 Duplicate Jokes: 9


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The best of viperuk's 58 jokes (View All)
An Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub.

We didn't invite the welshman because he's a cunt. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 6 months ago - Current Score: 819.8

My 10 year old son has become a cheeky git lately. Last night at dinner time he refused to eat his vegetables and sarcastically said he would rather be raped than eat Spinach.

Lets just say that tonight he ate his food without saying a word... 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 323

10 ways to lose things and still make money. I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke submitted by viperuk, originally by Kate and Jerry McCann which requires categorising - Added: 4 months ago - Current Score: 111.8

I find it ironic that women keep battling for equal rights, but there was outcry when the half-man, half-woman Caster Semenya won the race recently.

Ladies, if you can't beat half a man how do you expect to be as good as a whole one? 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 6 months ago - Current Score: 105

I tried to pay a hooker for sex last night but ended up getting the shit kicked out of me.

Lesson learnt. Rugby players don't take it up the arse like American Footballers do. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 6 months ago - Current Score: 100.2

What's brown, smells and doesn't float?

The Muslim who was standing next to me on the ferry. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 100

I was shocked and appalled after watching Question Time on the BBC last night. Since when did black people get the right to vote? I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 5 months ago - Current Score: 96.2

Was on a first date last night and after a few drinks we got talking about nicknames.

"My penis is known as Kanye West" I said. "Ooh does that mean it's large like a black mans?" she replied with a cheeky smile.

"No" I replied "Its because it appears out of nowhere when people least expect it and makes girls cry". 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 5 months ago - Current Score: 88

Anyone else noticed that "Kanye West" is an anagram of "Black racist cunt"?

No? Well it fucking should be. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 6 months ago - Current Score: 85.2

Help! I'm devastated. I arrived home to find my kid has run away and there's no sign of her anywhere.

If one of you sick fuckers has her, kindly hand her back. I found her first, after all. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by viperuk which requires categorising - Added: 5 months ago - Current Score: 82

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