Yorkshire Jokes

Suicide bombers have today attacked Bradford city centre. Early estimates suggest they may have caused thousands of pounds worth of improvements.
I couldn't believe my eyes today. Driving through a rough Bradford council estate, I saw a white girl, pushing a pram, with a white baby in it!
A blunt and straight talking Barnsley lad wakes up one morning with a sore anus, so he goes to the local village shop and says to the assistant, "Na then lad, has tha got any arse cream?"
"Certainly," replies the assistant. "Do you want Magnum or Cornetto?"
In the town of Shrewsbury, they say it depends on which side of the river you're from as to whether you pronounce it "Shr-oo-sbury" or "Shr-ow-sbury".
It's the same in Dewsbury. One side of the river it's pronounced "Dyoosbury" and on the other side it's known as "Pak - i - stan".
Clubbers in Yorkshire have taken to using dental syringes to inject liquid Ecstasy directly into their mouths.

This dangerous process is known as 'E by gum'
I don't know why everyone is suddenly talking about Twerking. My mate from Yorkshire has been doing it for years.

As he says, it's how he gets t'money t'pay t'bills
Dr. Who lands the TARDIS on planet Earth way back in the Dark Ages, in a faraway land we now call Bangladesh.
"Where the bleedin' hell are we?" asks his companion, Donna.
"Well," replies the Doctor, leaving the Tardis and walking around, "judging by that disgusting smell and the fact that we appear to be surrounded by towelheads with no significant intelligence living in caves and mud huts... this is Bradford 2008!"