Have you heard about the new Exorcist film that is in production?
They get the devil to take the priest out of the child.
What does a Catholic priest have in common with a pint of guinness?
If you get a bad one, they both have serious repercussions for your arse.
Just saw in the news today a Catholic priest has been sentenced to jail for sexually abusing children.
In other news CNN has obtained footage of a bear shitting in the woods.
The stockbroker was nervous about being in prison because his cellmate looked like a real thug.
"Don't worry," the gruff looking fellow said, "I'm in here for a white collar crime too."
"Well, that's a relief," sighed the stockbroker. "I was sent to prison for fraud and insider trading."
"Oh nothing fancy like that for me," grinned the convict. "I just murdered a couple of priests."
A Catholic priest and a rabbi are walking down the street one day when they see a pair of angelic-looking 12-year-old boys playing football in the park.
The priest turns to the rabbi, nudges him in the ribs and says:
"I tell you what; let's go and screw those boys"
The rabbi looked at him curiously and answered:
"Out of what?"