A farmer has three daughters. They all want to go out with their beaus on Saturday night but the farmer insists that he meets the suiters first.

The first one arrives and knocks on the door and says,
"Hallo, my name's Joe, I've come to take Flo to the show, can she go?"
The farmer thinks he looks a likeable lad and insists Joe has her home by midnight.

The next knock of the door brings,
"Hi, my name is Reveal the rest of this joke

A farmer has three daughters. They all want to go out with their beaus on Saturday night but the farmer insists that he meets the suiters first.

The first one arrives and knocks on the door and says,
"Hallo, my name's Joe, I've come to take Flo to the show, can she go?"
The farmer thinks he looks a likeable lad and insists Joe has her home by midnight.

The next knock of the door brings,
"Hi, my name is hans, I come to take Nance to the dance any chance?"
The farmer thinks he's a smart lad so lets her go insisting hans has her home by midnight.

At the next knock of the door the young man says,
"Hello, my name's Tucker"

The farmer says "Piss off".

A German guy approaches a lady of the night. "I vish to buy sex viz you."
"OK," says the girl, "I'll charge 20 an hour."

"..ist goot, but I must varn, I am little kinky."

"No problem," she replies cautiously, "I can do a little kinky." So off they go to the girl's place, where the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.

"I vant zat you tie ze springs to each of y [...]

A German guy approaches a lady of the night. "I vish to buy sex viz you."
"OK," says the girl, "I'll charge 20 an hour."

"..ist goot, but I must varn, I am little kinky."

"No problem," she replies cautiously, "I can do a little kinky." So off they go to the girl's place, where the German produces four large bedsprings and a duck caller.

"I vant zat you tie ze springs to each of your hans und knees." The girl finds this most odd, but complies, fastening the springs as he had said, to her hands and knees.

"Now you vill get on your hans und knees." She does this, balancing precariously on the springs.

"You vill please to blow zis kwacker as I make the love to you." She finds it odd, but figures it's harmless (and the guy is paying.)

She finds the sex is fantastic, as she is bounced all over the room by the energetic German, all the time honking on the duck caller. The climax is the most sensational that she has ever experienced and it is several minutes before she has enough breath to say, "That was totally amazing, what do you call that position ?"

"Ah," says the German . . ."zat is ze....
four-sprung Duck technique.

hans turns up for his first day with the German Coast Guard. He's shown round the building, introduced to everyone, then taken to his new position as radio operator.
"Gut Mornink, hans," says the old hand. "As you are ze new guy, I am off down ze bier keller. Just remember, all international radio traffic must be in ze English", and leaves.
[...]

Reveal the rest of this joke

hans turns up for his first day with the German Coast Guard. He's shown round the building, introduced to everyone, then taken to his new position as radio operator.
"Gut Mornink, hans," says the old hand. "As you are ze new guy, I am off down ze bier keller. Just remember, all international radio traffic must be in ze English", and leaves.
hans sits listening to the radio for a while, when he hears a call.
"Mayday, Mayday - help us, can anyone hear us?"
"Yar," says hans. "Vot is Ze Problem?"
"Thank god," comes the voice. "We're on a yacht in the North Sea and we are sinking."
"Okay," says hans. "Vot are you sinking about?"

A man was walking down the street and noticed a sign reading "hans Schmidt's Chinese Laundry." Being of a curious nature, he entered and was greeted by an obviously Chinese man who introduced himself as hans Schmidt.

"How come you have a name like that?" inquired the stranger.

The Chinese gentleman explained in very broken English that when [...]

A man was walking down the street and noticed a sign reading "hans Schmidt's Chinese Laundry." Being of a curious nature, he entered and was greeted by an obviously Chinese man who introduced himself as hans Schmidt.

"How come you have a name like that?" inquired the stranger.

The Chinese gentleman explained in very broken English that when he landed in America he was standing in the immigration line behind a German. When asked his name, the German replied, "hans Schmidt."

When the immigration officer asked the Chinese man his name, he replied, "Sam Ting."