I've recently joined my local boxing club and the trainer there suggested that I tried skipping to get fitter.
After doing this for an hour, he handed me a rope and said, "Use this. You won't look as gay"
The first rule of Fight Club is, you do not talk about Fight Club.
The second rule of Fight Club is don't let Audley Harrison in, unless it's ladies night.
Why does everyone hate Audley Harrison?
It's not as if he has ever hurt anyone.
Started shadow boxing...
Well, just punching black people.
I was going to tell a David Haye joke, but I just can't seem to type properly since I broke my toe.
I love watching women's heavyweight boxing.
It's hilarious to see them fight back tears when the announcer tells everyone their weight.
I feel like I've been 12 rounds with Audley Harrison.
So David Haye has blamed the defeat on a broken toe.
Probably dropped a hardcopy of "Arsene Wenger's book of excuses" on it
I met a bloke in a wheelchair today, his face was battered and bruised.
"What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?" I enquired.
"No..." he said, "... hurdles."
So here I am in the Internet Cafe with the biggest fucking nigger I've ever seen reading every word I ty
But it's alright it was only Audley Harrison