Jokes under Sex and shit > Paedophile
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When a man ejaculates, he comes at twenty miles per hour. Which means it's perfectly safe to hit a child. |
 
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A man walked to a primary school at home time for the children. One young teacher approached the man and asked him 'so which child is yours?' To which the man replied, 'I don't mind, surprise me.' |
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Joke
by fiesta_09 in Sex and shit - Paedophile - Added: 2 years, 7 months ago - Current Score: 2,416.2
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My brother just updated his status to "I love my girlfriend <3". I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous. |
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Joke
by gaz00 in Crime - Paedophilia (+ 2 more) - Added: 1 year, 8 months ago - Current Score: 2,176.6
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It's so awkward when you send a private text message to the wrong person. The other day I wrote a message, "Hey babe, thinking of U makes my cock hard, can't wait to sex U up 2night" and sent it to my 10-year-old daughter. Imagine how embarrassing it would have been if I'd sent that to the wrong person. |
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Joke
by phibsboro in Sex and shit - Incest (+ 1 more) - Added: 1 year, 9 months ago - Current Score: 2,174.4
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Just saw a Facebook group: "Hi, I'm a bra. I touch your girlfriend's boobs every day... Jealous yet? ;D" Joke's on them, my girlfriend doesn't need a bra yet. |
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Joke
by magicalmyserytour in Sex and shit - Paedophile - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago - Current Score: 2,136.6
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Underage girl, sucking on daddy's cock, gets jizzed on all over he......... Oh I'm sorry, I thought this was a google image search. |
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Joke
by ihaveitchyballs in Sex and shit - Paedophile (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 years, 9 months ago - Current Score: 2,120.6
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Didn't help myself in court yesterday. I was arrested for child porn charges and the Judge said, "How does 5-6 years sound?" I said, "Sexy." |
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Being a Paedophile living in Liverpool, I try to attract girls aged 13 to 14. As these are usually the ones with the youngest kids. |
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Did you hear about the Jewish paedophile? He comes out from behind the bushes and says, "Hey little boy, want to buy some sweets?" |
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Joke
by immortalshadow666 in Racism - Jew (+ 1 more) - Added: 4 years, 11 months ago - Current Score: 1,808
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I was standing there, hands trembling, my wife due home from work any time now... I reached for my youngest daughter's top - it came off with little resistance.
Her training bra was my next hurdle. Hands still trembling, I gently unclipped it and unable to control my hands I watched it as it fell to the floor. Her short little skirt was next, I reached out and slid it off. As I ran my hands slowly over her My Little Pony panties I could feel they were already r [...] |
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