Add Joke - All Jokes - Categories - Recent Changes - Forum - Feedback - About - Buy The Book - RSS
Search:
Welcome, Guest!
Would you like to log in , or create an account?
Report a site problem
Browsing tag: apple
Sorted by: Highest Scoring | Lowest Scoring | Newest | Oldest

Page 1 of 2 - Next Page

A nigger and an apple fall from a tree at the same time. Which one hits the ground first?

The apple. The rope stops the nigger.
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by RobBWFC, in Religion and racism > Pakistani - Tagged nigger , hanging , apple  - Current Score: 219 - Added: 3 months, 22 days ago

Apparently about 1 person in 10 is homosexual.
Also around 1 person in 10 uses an Apple Mac.

Coincidence?
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by binglebangle, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged mac , apple , gay  - Current Score: 136 - Added: 4 months ago

I was watching American Pie the other day and I thought, "I might try that." I didn't have any pie, so I made do with an apple.

Chris Martin wasn't very happy.
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by albinobob123, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged american pie , pie , apple , chris martin , rape , sex  - Current Score: 93 - Added: 2 months ago

I love September 11th.

On this day every year my Muslim neighbours make me apple crumble.
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by jokeywokey, in Religion and racism > Suicide Bombers - Tagged muslim , 911 , new york , crumble , big , apple , get it  - Current Score: 37 - Added: 2 months ago

What's the difference between an apple and a baby?

You don't ejaculate on an apple before you eat it.
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by We Are The Lemon, in Illness and mortality > Dead Babies - Tagged apple , baby , come , ejaculate , wank , eat  - Current Score: 32 - Added: 1 year, 10 months ago

What's worse than finding a maggot in your apple?

Rape.
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by hismastersvice, in Sex and shit > Rape - Tagged apple , rape , gangrape  - Current Score: 28 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago

What's round, hard and smells of apple?

Chris Martin's fist.
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by pally76, in Sex and shit > Babies - Tagged apple , chris martin , fist , smell  - Current Score: 24 - Added: 2 months ago

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Cider doesn't count, you alky bastard.

I find a couple of rashers of bacon work better at keeping the doctor away.
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by smiddy, in Jokes with no home > Random - Tagged alcholic , drunk , drink , apple , doctor  - Current Score: 23 - Added: 4 weeks ago

A man goes to the doctor's for a cock extension. The doctor suggests a baby elephant's trunk stitched on, at a cost of £5,000. The man agrees.
Six weeks later, whilst having dinner with a new woman, he feels an unusual stirring in his pants and thinks, "this is the night".
Whilst chatting over dinner, his cock flies out and steals an apple off the table and then goes back.
"Wow!" she says. "Can you do that again?"
He says, "my cock can, but I don't think my arse can take another apple."
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by MissTourettes, in Sex and shit > Elephants - Tagged man , doctors , cock extension , baby elephants trunk , stitched , cost , 5000 , dinner , stirring , pants , cock , apple , table , arse  - Current Score: 17 - Added: 1 month, 27 days ago

My girlfriend said my breath smell like apple.
How she knows I'm babysitting for Chris and Gwyneth I'll never know!!
I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by SisterFister, in Celebrity and news events > Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow - Tagged gwyneth paltrow , chris martin , peado , paedophile , apple  - Current Score: 7 - Added: 2 weeks ago

Page 1 of 2 - Next Page

Custurd spent 0.59ms doing 12 queries and 0.09s processing. She's 1.48% angry.
Sickipedia v2.7 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel