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| A lad is in a bus station, and goes into the toilets to piss. When he walks in he sees a Leprechaun with the most enormous dick he had ever seen. As he pees, he cannot avoid spying on the giant member of the tiny man dressed in green. The Leprechaun zips up and the lad asks him if he is indeed a real Leprechaun. The little man says, "Aye me boy, I'm a Leprechaun, and I can grant you three wishes." "Really?!" comes the reply, "What do I need to do?!" "Well, havin' such a large cock makes it a bit awkward with the ladies, the thing not fittin' and all... I'll grant you your three wishes if you wouldn't mind suckin' me dick until I come." The lad is a bit taken aback, but agrees, because he knows he can wish for anything he wants later. The Leprechaun smiles away until he comes down the lad's throat. The lad says, "Hey, what about my three wishes?" The Leprechaun asks, "How old are you me boy?" "18," he says. "Aren't you a bit too old to still be believin' in Leprechauns?!" |    |
Joke by Sticky, in Illness and mortality > Old people - Tagged old people , fairy , banker , women - Current Score: 154 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| The local news station was interviewing an 80-year-old lady because she had just gotten married -- for the fourth time. The interviewer asked her questions about her life, about what it felt like to be marrying again at 80, and then about her new husband's occupation. 'He's a funeral director,' she answered. 'Interesting,' the newsman thought. He then asked her if she wouldn't mind telling him a little about her first three husbands and what they did for a living. She paused for a few moments, needing time to reflect on all those years. After a short time, a smile came to her face and she answered proudly, explaining that she'd first married a banker when she was in her early 20's, then a circus ringmaster when in her 40's, later on a preacher when in her 60's, and now in her 80's, a funeral director. The interviewer looked at her, quite astonished, and asked why she had married four men with such diverse careers. She smiled and explained, 'I married one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, and four to go.' | |
Joke by niggers out, in Illness and mortality > Marriage - Tagged preacker , ringmaster , funeral , director , banker , husband , old , lady , marriage - Current Score: 42 - Added: 5 months, 20 days ago
| A farmer went to the local bank to borrow money for a new bull. The loan was made and Banker Bill, who lent the money, came by a week later to see how the bull was doing. The farmer complained that the bull just ate grass and wouldn't even look at a cow. Banker Bill suggested that he have a veterinarian take a look at the bull. Next week, Banker Bill returned to see if the vet had helped. The farmer looked very pleased. "The bull has serviced all of my cows! He broke through the fence, and bred all my neighbor's cows! He's been breeding just about everything in sight. He's like a machine!" "Wow," said Banker Bill, "what did the vet do to that bull?" "Just gave him some pills," replied the farmer. "What kind of pills?" asked Banker Bill. "I don't know, but they kind of taste like peppermint." | |
Joke by niggers out, in Jokes with no home > Animals - Tagged bull , vet , banker , pills , farmer - Current Score: 12 - Added: 3 months, 15 days ago
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