Tag: blond - Sickipedia

Browsing tag: blond
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After having their 11th child, a Liverpool couple decided that was enough, as the social wouldn't buy them a bigger bed and they weren't strong enough to nick one.

The husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would fix the problem but it was expensive.

A less costly alternative was to go home, get a firework, light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.

The Scouser said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest guy in the world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."

"Trust me, it will do the job", said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a banger and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count: "1, 2, 3, 4, 5," at which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs so he could continue counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Middlesbrough, parts of Bradford, anywhere in Scotland and most blondes

Joke by New Saint, in Sex and shit > Mistake - Tagged scousers , scottish , vasectomy , blond - Current Score: 106 - Added: 10 months ago

How do you keep a blonde busy for 24 hours?

Scroll down

Scroll up

Joke by superhorse, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond , stupid , busy - Current Score: 57 - Added: 7 months ago

What do you get when a naked blonde does a handstand?

A brunette with bad breath.

Joke by pdf1, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond , handstand - Current Score: 34 - Added: 11 months ago

A blonde was recently hired at an office. Her first task was to go out
for coffee. Eager to do well her first day on the job, she grabbed a large
thermos and hurried to a nearby coffee shop.
She held up the thermos and the coffee shop worker quickly came over to
take her order.
She asked, "Is this big enough to hold six cups of coffee?"
The coffee shop worker looked at the thermos, hesitated a few seconds,
then finally replied, "Yeah. It looks like about six cups to me."
"Oh good!" the blonde sighed in relief. "Then give me two regular, two
black, and two decaf."

Joke by kidneykutter, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond , coffee - Current Score: 23 - Added: 3 months, 29 days ago

A blonde decides to do something she's never done before - rent a dirty movie. She drives to the local Video Warehouse and makes here way to the adult section in the back. After looking around at titles, she selects a something that sounds very stimulating.

She drives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR. To her disappointment there's nothing but static on the screen. She calls the store to complain and says,I just rented an adult movie from you and there's nothing on the tape, but static.

The clerk apologized about the defective video and asked, Which title did you rent? The blonde replied, It's called Head Cleaner.

Joke by lurch_555, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond , vcr - Current Score: 22 - Added: 5 months, 29 days ago

A blonde with two burnt ears goes to the doctor, who asks what has happened.
"The phone rang, and I accidentally picked up the iron."
"What about the other one?"
"They called back."

Joke by tomabe32, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond , iron , accident - Current Score: 16 - Added: 8 months ago

A blonde goes into work one morning crying her eyes out. Her boss, concerned about all his employees' well being, asked sympathetically, "What's the matter?" To which the blonde replies, "Early this morning I got a phone call saying that my mother had passed away."

The boss, feeling very sorry at this point, explains to the young girl. "Why don't you go home for the day.....we aren't terribly busy. Just take the day off to relax and rest."

The blonde very calmly states, "No, I'd be better off here. I need to keep my mind off it and I have the best chance of doing that here." The boss agrees and allows the blonde to work as usual, "If you need anything, just
let me know."

Well, a few hours passed and the boss decides to check on the blonde. He looks out over his office and sees the blonde hysterically crying!! He rushes out to her, asking, "What's so bad now........are you gonna be OK??" "No," exclaims the blonde. "I just got a call from my sister. She told me that HER mum died too!!"

Joke by lurch_555, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond , mum - Current Score: 13 - Added: 5 months ago

i went into my local pub and shouted,
"who wants magic sex tonight"?
"whats that"? asked this ugly blond in the corner,
"i take you home.....fuck you....then....you disappear" i said

Joke by garrygwizz, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged sex , blond , ugly , magic - Current Score: 12 - Added: 2 months ago

What do you call a blonde with half a brain?

Gifted...

What do you call a blond with a whole brain?

A golden retriever!!!

Joke by kermithebastard, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond , brain , golden retriever - Current Score: 10 - Added: 4 months ago

What do you call a blonde with dyed brown hair?

Artificial Intelligence

Joke by Guest, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blond - Current Score: 5 - Added: 5 months ago

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