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| Paedophile Pete is walking down the street and he runs into one of his buddies. His buddy says, "hey, Pete, was that your new girlfriend I saw you with the other day?" Peter, looking somewhat embarrassed and shamed, says "yeah." His buddy says, "how old is she?" Looking even more shame-faced, Pete replies, "nine." His buddy says, "isn't that a little old for you?". Pete says, "yeah, but she's got the body of a six year old!" |    |
Joke by ht, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged paedophile , pete , body - Current Score: 73 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| I feel really sorry for Gerry McCann. With no sign of the media interest dying down, it'll be ages before they can sneak back to where the body is for a wank. | |
Joke by itchyanus, in Celebrity and news events > A Levels - Tagged body , madeleine mccann , maddie , madeleine , wank , kate mccann , gerry mccann - Current Score: 50 - Added: 4 months ago
| The teacher asks Little Johnny "Which body part goes to heaven first?" Little Johnny replies "The feet miss" So the teacher says "Why the feet?" Little Johnny says "Because when I go in my mummys bedroom at night she has her legs in the air shouting 'Oh my God I'm coming'" | |
Joke by Gobshite, in Jokes with no home > School - Tagged johnny , body , heaven - Current Score: 36 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| I'm treating my body like a temple from now on. You have to take your shoes off before you enter me. | |
Joke by marcusaurelius, in Sex and shit > General - Tagged body , temple , enter , sex - Current Score: 19 - Added: 2 months, 23 days ago
| A man turns to his new girlfriend and says, "since I first laid eyes upon your beautiful body. I've wanted to make love to you really, really badly." The girlfriend responds, "well, you succeeded." | |
Joke by joshskie, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged man , girlfriend , body , badly , succeeded - Current Score: 18 - Added: 5 months, 23 days ago
| Three cowboys get drunk at a bar. Cowboy #1 demands a whore from the bartender. The whoreless bartender goes to the supply shop and desperately asks the clerk for a prostitute. Although the clerk doesn't have a whore, he has an inflatable woman. The bartender takes it to the second floor of his bar, blows it up, and lays it on the bed. Going back downstairs, he tells the cowboy that she is upstairs. Cowboy #3, the smallest goes first and stays up for ten minutes after which he comes back down. When asked by the others about her, he replies "She had a firm body, but she sure didn't say much." They laugh and cowboy #2, a medium sized man goes up. Upon his arrival in the bar he is asked the same question to which he gives the same answer. Cowboy #1, the biggest, goes up and two minutes later comes down with a dazzeled expression. "What happened?" the others asked. "When I got on top of her, she suddenly farted and jumped out the window!" | |
Joke by McLOVIN, in Jokes with no home > Pub - Tagged cowboy , pub , sex , man , woman , prostitute , body , bar - Current Score: 8 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| Tip- If you ever murder someone, and need to dispose of the body, I have the perfect place to hide it- Page 2 of Sickipedia's "New Jokes Today." No-one ever looks there! | |
Joke by petejtool, in Jokes with no home > Sickipedia - Tagged sickipedia , murder , body , jokes , page 2 - Current Score: 7 - Added: 3 months ago
| When my wife was giving birth I found myself knee deep in blood, trying to stop the screaming. Then I found out about the birth, so I dumped the body enroute to the hospital. | |
Joke by albinobob123, in Sex and shit > Pregnancy - Tagged wife , body , murder - Current Score: 3 - Added: 1 month, 27 days ago
| I'd hate to be the poor fucker who has to clean the mess up in the leper colony after they've finished the hokey-kokey! | |
Joke by geebee, in Illness and mortality > Leprosy - Tagged leg , arm , head , body - Current Score: 2 - Added: 1 month ago
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