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| I was walking along a high cliff one day and saw a little boy, all alone and he was crying. I asked him, "Son, what are you doing up here all alone?" He replied, with tears in his eyes, "My mum's down there at the bottom. She fell!" "That's terrible!" I said. "And your dad?" "He's down there right next to her. He tried to save her and he fell too!" "That's awful!" I said. We shared a quiet moment there, together, looking out at the sky over that grand cliff. And then, when he asked me why I was unbuckling my belt, I told him, "Son, today just isn't your day." |    |
Joke by caliban, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged paedophile , paedophilia , cliff , paedo , fall , boy , cry , crying - Current Score: 713 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| In a second grade class, a little girl asks, "Teacher, can my Mommy get pregnant?" "How old is your mother, dear?" asks the teacher. "Forty." she replies. "Yes, dear, your mother could get pregnant." The little girl then asks, "Can my big sister get pregnant?" "Well, dear, how old is your sister?" The little girl answers, "Nineteen." "Oh yes, dear, your sister certainly could get pregnant." The little girl then asks, "Can I get pregnant?" "How old are you, dear?" The little girl answers, "I'm seven years old." "No, dear, you can't get pregnant..." Then, the little boy behind the little girl gives her a poke and says, "See, I told you we had nothing to worry about." | |
Joke by niggers out, in Sex and shit > Little Girl/little Boy - Tagged kids , pregnant , mother , teacher , girl , boy , young - Current Score: 311 - Added: 9 months, 25 days ago
| A paedophile and a small child are walking through the woods. It's a foul night; lightning spearing the sky and thunder is crashing. The child looks up at the paedo and says, "I'm scared". The paedophile says, "What the fuck are you moaning for? I've got to walk back on my own!" | |
Joke by caliban, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged paedophilia , paedophile , paedo , child , boy , woods , forest , lightening , storm , scared , thunder - Current Score: 298 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| When I was just a little girl, I asked my mother: "What will I be? Will I be pretty? Will I be rich?" Here's what she said to me: "You're a boy, you daft cunt. Now get out of your sister's clothes and fuck off to school!" | |
Joke by mallatar, in Jokes with no home > Doris Day Songs - Tagged doris day , boy , girl , tv - Current Score: 274 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| A little boy goes to see the doctor with a problem. He said to the doctor, "Doctor, I was in the showers with all the other boys, and my penis looked different to all of theirs. Why is that?" The doctor replies, "I don't know, I'm going to have to have a look - now you can go behind that curtain to get undressed." The little boy comes out and says, "Where shall I put my clothes?" The doctor replies, "Just over there, next to mine." | |
Joke by The Wolf, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged paedophile , paedophillia , doctor , boy , rape - Current Score: 266 - Added: 5 months, 16 days ago
| I was walking along the beach when I saw a small boy lying on the sand who had been stung by a jelly fish. I remembered that if you're stung by one you should to piss on it, so I whipped my dick out and started pissing on him. His parents weren't too pleased though, apparently it doesn't work when they're dead. | |
Joke by The Wolf, in Jokes with no home > Jimmy Carr - Tagged jelly , fish , boy , piss , jimmy carr - Current Score: 190 - Added: 7 months, 19 days ago
| What's the difference between acne and a Catholic priest? Acne doesn't come on a boy's face until he's 13 or so. | |
Joke by caliban, in Religion and racism > Catholicism - Tagged catholic , priest , acne , child , boy - Current Score: 184 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is Little Johnny on his shiny new bike. The cop says to the Little Johnny, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Little Johnny replies, "Yeah." The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike." The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket. Little Johnny takes the ticket and before he rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?" Humoring Little Johnny, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did." Little Johnny continued, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the dick underneath the horse, instead of on top." | |
Joke by Hintonian, in Jokes with no home > Police - Tagged santa , police , boy , horse , little johnny - Current Score: 135 - Added: 10 months, 5 days ago
| A man and his young son go into the doctors, " Doctor, doctor- my son has just swallowed a camera!" The doctor looks at him and replies, " Well, leave it a few days and see what develops!" The boy replies, "What? Its a fucking digital, you old cunt." | |
Joke by twayne, in Illness and mortality > Doctor - Tagged camera , classics retold , doctor , digital , boy , man , cunt , medicine - Current Score: 105 - Added: 5 months, 5 days ago
| A blonde woman was having financial troubles so she decided to kidnap a child and demand a ransom. She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note. "I have kidnapped your child. I am sorry to do this but I need the money. Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park at 7 AM." Signed, "The Blonde". She pinned the note inside the little boy's jacket and told him to go straight home. The next morning, she returned to the park to find the $10,000 in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as she had instructed. Inside the bag was the following note. "Here is your money. I cannot believe that one blonde would do this to another." | |
Joke by PALROSS, in Celebrity and news events > viagra - Tagged blonde , ransom , money , thick , stupid , dumb , boy , kidnap - Current Score: 64 - Added: 10 months, 25 days ago
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