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| My wife was so sick this morning that I had to carry her to the kitchen to make my breakfast. |    |
Joke by bod88, in Jokes with no home > Sexist - Tagged sexist , wife , breakfast - Current Score: 188 - Added: 1 month, 23 days ago
| At 7am, a lone wife hears a key in the front door. She wanders down, bleary eyed, to find her husband in the kitchen with ruffled hair and lipstick on his collar. 'I assume,' she snarls, 'that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at seven in the morning..?' 'There is,' he replies, 'Breakfast.' | |
Joke by pdf1, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged husband , wife , breakfast - Current Score: 133 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| An Englishman is having breakfast one morning (coffee, croissants, bread, butter and jam) when a Frenchman, chewing gum, sits down next to him. The Englishman ignores the Frenchman who, nevertheless, starts a conversation. Frenchman: "You English folk eat the whole bread?" Englishman (in a bad mood): "Of course." Frenchman: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. In France, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to the English." The Frenchman has a smirk on his face. The Englishman listens in silence. The Frenchman persists: "Do you eat jam with the bread?" Englishman: "Yes." Frenchman: (cracking his gum between his teeth and chuckling). "We don't. In France we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell the jam to the British." The Englishman then asks: "Do you have sex in France?" Frenchman: "Why of course we do", he says with a big smirk. Englishman: "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?" Frenchman: "We throw them away, of course." Englishman: "We don't. In England, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into chewing gum and sell them to France." | |
Joke by tokem0n, in Religion and racism > French - Tagged french , english , breakfast - Current Score: 110 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| What's fat and ugly and likes coke for breakfast? Kerry Katona | |
Joke by BruceWillis, in Celebrity and news events > Kerry Katona - Tagged kerry katona , coke , breakfast , druggie - Current Score: 57 - Added: 8 months, 11 days ago
| My wife says that I'm misogynistic: I don't know what it means. So I've told her that, when she brings me the newspapers and my breakfast in bed in the morning, to fetch me a dictionary as well. | |
Joke by billysollocks, in Sex and shit > Marriage - Tagged misogynistic , newspapers , wife , breakfast , bed - Current Score: 47 - Added: 7 months, 28 days ago
| Two rats in a sewer. The first one says, " I'm sick of this, turds for breakfast, turds for dinner, yet more turds for tea and - Fuck Me! - guess what? A turd for supper." And the other rat says, "don't worry, tonight we'll go on the piss." | |
Joke by pornstar, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged rats , turds , piss , breakfast , dinner , tea , supper , sewer - Current Score: 38 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| According to recent studies, blow jobs are a healthy breakfast for women. They come with one sausage, two nuts and a protein shot. Stay healthy, suck dick! | |
Joke by wolverine, in Sex and shit > Blow Job - Tagged sausage , breakfast , dick - Current Score: 17 - Added: 1 month, 27 days ago
| A mate of mine with Parkinsons bet me a fiver he could eat his breakfast without spilling any of it He ended up with egg on his face | |
Joke by lashley, in Illness and mortality > Parkinsons - Tagged parkinsons , breakfast , egg - Current Score: 7 - Added: 4 weeks ago
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