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| A man joins the foreign legion as an officer. When he reaches his position (a fort in the middle of a desert) he is brought in by the commanding officer. While he is being lead to his room his spots an old, pasty-looking camel. "What's that camel for?" he asks. "That camel is used when the men can't control their... 'urges' any longer," the commanding officer replies. The man stay stays in the fort for a couple months. However, one day he cannot control his frustration any longer. "BRING IN THE CAMEL!" he shouts to his soldiers. The camel is led in, he shuts the door and bangs it every way possible. Satisfied he buckles his pants up and asks the commanding officer, "is that how everyone else does it?" "Well... the rest of us just ride it to the brothel in town," the Commanding Officer replies. |    |
Joke by D dude, in Sex and shit > Bestiality - Tagged camel , foreign legion - Current Score: 131 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| An Arab buys a camel and he proudly decides to ride it around his local pub carpark, causing a bit of a stir with the local drinkers. "Nice camel mate," One of the drinkers commented, "Is it male or female?" "It's female!" said the Arab. "How can you tell?" said the drinker. "Well," the Arab explained, "on the way here today, at least twenty people yelled out,'Hey, Look at the dirty, smelly cunt on that camel!" | |
Joke by andino, in Religion and racism > indian - Tagged arab , cunt , camel - Current Score: 92 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| Two old ladies are having a cigarette outside the old folks home and it starts to rain. One of them suddenly pulls a condom out of her handbag, unravels it and puts it over the cigarette so it doesn't get wet. "Ooh, what's that, Betty?" the other asks. "It's called a condom, they sell them at the chemist's dear," she answers. So the other goes to the chemist's and, when asked for a condom by such an elderly lady and seeing an opportunity for mirth, the young oik behind the counter smirks and asks, "so what would you like, a ribbed one, a French tickler, flavoured?" "Oh, I don't mind, dear, as long as it fits a Camel." | |
Joke by ht, in Sex and shit > Granny Shagger - Tagged granny , smoking , camel - Current Score: 80 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| Why don't they have driving lessons and sex education on the same day in Iraq? They don't want to wear out the camel! | |
Joke by sick puppy, in Religion and racism > Iraq - Tagged iraq , sex , driving , camel - Current Score: 67 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| A man has spent many days crossing the desert without water. His camel dies of thirst. He's crawling through the sands, certain that he has breathed his last, when all of a sudden he sees an object sticking out of the sand several yards ahead of him. He crawls to the object, pulls it out of the sand, and discovers what looks to be an old brief case. He opens it and out pops a genie.... But this is no ordinary genie. He is wearing an Inland Revenue ID badge and dull grey suit. There's a calculator in his pocket. He has a pencil tucked behind one ear. "Well, kid," says the genie, "you know how it works. You have three wishes." "I'm not falling for this," says the man, "I'm not going to trust a person from the Inland Revenue." "What do you have to lose? You've got no transportation, and it looks like you're a goner anyway!" The man thinks about this for a minute, and decides that the genie is right. "Okay, I wish I were in a lush oasis with plentiful food and drink." ***POOF*** The man finds himself in the most beautiful oasis he has ever seen, and he is surrounded with jugs of wine and platters of delicacies. "Okay, kid, what's your second wish?" "My second wish is that I were rich beyond my wildest dreams." ***POOF*** The man finds himself surrounded by treasure chests filled with rare gold coins and precious gems. "Okay, kid, you have just one more wish. Better make it a good one!" After thinking for a few minutes, the man says, "I wish that, no matter where I go, beautiful women will want and need me." ***POOF*** He is turned into a tampon. The moral of the story? If the Revenue offers you anything, there's bound to be a string attached! | |
Joke by niggers out, in Illness and mortality > A Man Was...... - Tagged genie , wishes , camel , taxman - Current Score: 48 - Added: 9 months, 17 days ago
| An arab is walking through customs and the customs woman wants to ask him some questions. "Sex?" asks the customs woman "Yes, please!" says the arab "No, I mean male or female?" says the customs woman The arab says, "Both...and sometimes camel too!" | |
Joke by Borat, in Religion and racism > indian - Tagged arab , muslim , islam , camel , beastiality - Current Score: 39 - Added: 9 months ago
| Why is the camel called the ship of the desert? Because it's full of Arab semen. | |
Joke by sickfuck, in Religion and racism > indian - Tagged arab , camel , semen - Current Score: 36 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| A nun and a priest were crossing the Sahara desert on a camel. On the third day out, the camel suddenly dropped dead without warning. After dusting themselves off, the nun and the priest surveyed their situation. After a long period of silence, the priest spoke. "Well, sister, this looks pretty grim." "I know, father." "In fact, I don't think it likely that we can survive more than a day or two." "I agree", says the Father, "Sister, since we are unlikely to make it out of here alive, would you do something for me?" "Anything, Father." "I have never seen a woman's boobs and I was wondering if I might see yours." "Well, under the circumstances I don't see that it would do any harm." The nun opened her habit and the priest enjoyed the sight of her shapely boobs, commenting frequently on their beauty. "Sister, would you mind if I touched them?" She consented and he fondled them for several minutes. "Father, could I ask something of you?" "Yes, Sister?" "I have never seen a man's Willie. Could I see yours?" "I suppose that would be OK," the priest replied lifting his robe. "Oh Father, may I touch it?" The priest consented and after a few minutes of fondling he was sporting a huge erection. "Sister, you know that if I insert my Willie in the right place, it can give life." "Is that true father?" "Yes, it is, Sister." "Oh Father that's wonderful, stick it in the camel and let's get the hell out of here." | |
Joke by sick puppy, in Sex and shit > General - Tagged priest , nun , camel - Current Score: 23 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| I class myself as a sexual tiger....always on the prowl. My new girlfriend is a sexual camel....one hump and the bitch is good for months. | |
Joke by MICK THE MAG, in Sex and shit > Girlfriend - Tagged camel , girlfriend , hump , prowl , tiger - Current Score: 21 - Added: 4 months, 11 days ago
| What do you call a arab with his hand up a camel's arse? A mechanic. | |
Joke by Sparrow91, in Religion and racism > Aborigines - Tagged arabs , camel - Current Score: 19 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
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