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| Drogba said that for him the turning point in the game was when his early penalty appeal was turned down after he dramatically threw himself to the ground. The referee had a point though, as the anthems were still being played. |    |
Joke by nevergreen, in Celebrity and news events > Chelsea - Tagged chelsea , chelski , drogba , european cup , england - Current Score: 64 - Added: 6 months, 11 days ago
| A Ukranian woman bumps into Chelsea footy team at a nightclub. She goes up to John Terry and asks him to sign her left breast, he says yes so she lifts up her top and he signs it. She then asks Drogba to sign her right breast, he also says yes so she lifts up her top again and he signs it. She then asks Roman Abramovich to sign her "lady's area", Roman says yes and she pulls down her knickers, to which he replies, "Actually on second thoughts I'll pass- the last time I signed a Ukrainian twat it cost me £30 million." | |
Joke by J111STRX8, in Celebrity and news events > Football - Tagged chelsea , chelski , football , london , cunt , shevchenko - Current Score: 54 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| What do Princess Diana & John Terry have in common? They both hit the post | |
Joke by J111STRX8, in Celebrity and news events > Chelsea - Tagged chelski , john "cry baby" terry , cheat , spit , diana - Current Score: 40 - Added: 6 months, 11 days ago
| Champions League final match ticket: £500 Flight to Moscow: £800 Having to watch the game at home because your aircraft broke down at Gatwick: FUCKING PRICELESS! | |
Joke by steview, in Celebrity and news events > Chelsea - Tagged chelski , cancelled flight , priceless - Current Score: 32 - Added: 6 months, 12 days ago
| Apparently Luiz Felipe Scolari was only Chelsea's second choice. They offered the job first to the British Olympic diving coach but he turned it down | |
Joke by nevergreen, in Celebrity and news events > Chelsea - Tagged chelsea , chelski , scolari - Current Score: 14 - Added: 5 months, 20 days ago
| You're trapped in a room with a lion, a cobra snake and a Chelsea Fan. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do? Shoot the Chelsea Fan. Twice. | |
Joke by J111STRX8, in Celebrity and news events > Football - Tagged chelsea , chelski , football , london , lion , cobra , snake - Current Score: 13 - Added: 1 year ago
| Two Chelsea fans jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground first? Who gives a fuck? | |
Joke by J111STRX8, in Celebrity and news events > Football - Tagged chelsea , chelski , football , london - Current Score: 8 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| From The Official Chelsea FC Maths Workbook, which covers sums for practising Key Stage Two maths for 7-11 year olds. This has been introduced as part of the Government's maths campaign. 1. If one minute of time is taken up in a game for substitutions and one minute for injuries, how much injury time will be added on by the referee if Chelsea are losing at home? 2. You are the referee at Stamford Bridge. How near to a visiting defender does a tumbling Didier Drogba have to be to earn a penalty if he goes down in the box? (Note: Round your answers down to the nearest 20 yards.) 3. Probability. Express the statistical probability of visitors to Stamford Bridge being awarded a penalty. Compare this with the probability of opponents of Chelsea being awarded a penalty home or away, and then discuss if a penalty awarded to Chelsea would be awarded to their opponents in identical circumstances. 4. Jose had a hotel room booked in Athens for the Champions League Final. How much money did he lose when cancelling his reservation? 5.Andriy is a very lazy boy and often goes missing. Jose is very cross and wants to sell him. If Andriy cost £30m to buy, how much do you think Jose will sell him for? How many pennies will Jose lose? 6. Didier is very strong and fast. How much pressure need be applied to make him tumble over in the opponents penalty area? (Note: Answers must be in lbs per square inch. However, answers such as, 'However much pressure is applied by Jose Mourinho to referees' are accepted.) 7. What is the total number of chickens counted before they were hatched by Chelsea and their supporters who thought Manchester United were a pushover. | |
Joke by tokem0n, in Celebrity and news events > Chelsea - Tagged chelsea , chelski , football. - Current Score: 1 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
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