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| A quarter of over 50's are failing to save. It's CTRL & S. You old fucks. |    |
Joke by AS, in Illness and mortality > Old People - Tagged save , 50 , ctrl , it , oap , computer - Current Score: 252 - Added: 6 months ago
| Computers are like air conditioners. They work fine until you start opening windows. | |
Joke by AS, in Jokes with no home > Computers - Tagged computer , windows - Current Score: 164 - Added: 4 months ago
| I don't know, the modern world. All these electrical apparatus that speak to you. I have a computer that tells me it has updated itself, an alarm clock that tells me its time to wake up, a sat-nav system that tells me the right direction and a bedside lamp that tells me to go out and kill women. | |
Joke by staffer, in Illness and mortality > Mental - Tagged bedside , lamp , satnav , alarm , apparatus , computer , maybe viz i dont know , yep vintage viz - Current Score: 151 - Added: 2 months, 30 days ago
| My computer beat me at chess a few days ago. It was no match for me at kickboxing though | |
Joke by gangrath, in Jokes with no home > Computers - Tagged kickboxing , computer - Current Score: 149 - Added: 4 months ago
| It's amazing the service that we, the taxpayer, get from the Police these days. A couple of months ago, some Police officers kicked my front door in and took my broken computer away. I wasn't quite sure what was going on but they returned it two months later and it was working fine again. They even paid for a new front door and gave me a grand for my trouble. Brilliant service! But the best bit is, I've put my old hard drive back in it and can now watch all my favourite kiddie porn again. Thanks guys. Top job. | |
Joke by asskika, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged police , porn , computer - Current Score: 135 - Added: 1 month, 27 days ago
| Shannon Matthews real father, Bernard Matthews, has been arrested as his computer had pictures of a fowl nature. | |
Joke by jokeywokey, in Celebrity and news events > Shannon Matthews - Tagged shannon , matthews , fowl , child , porn , computer - Current Score: 73 - Added: 2 months ago
| Computer games don't affect kids. I mean, if Pac-Man had affected us as kids, we'd all be running around in dark rooms, munching pills and listening to repetitive electronic music. | |
Joke by Guest, in Jokes with no home > Gamer And Real World - Tagged computer , games , computer games , gamer , pacman , pac man , game , gaming , kids , drugs , music , electronic , marcus brigstocke - Current Score: 53 - Added: 8 months, 28 days ago
| World War III. The U.S.A. have succeeded in building a fantastic computer that is able to solve any strategical or tactical problem. The military leaders are assembled in front of the new machine. They describe the situation to the computer and then ask it: "Shall we attack? Shall we retreat?" The computer computes for an hour and then comes up with the answer. "Yes!" The generals, rather stupefied, look at each other. Finally one of them asks the computer: "Yes, what?" After another fifteen minutes the computer replies: "Yes, Sir!" | |
Joke by baldlice, in Religion and racism > Americans - Tagged america , war , world war , computer , attack - Current Score: 36 - Added: 4 months ago
| What's the difference between a woman and a computer? You only have to punch information into a computer once! | |
Joke by mefjam, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged computer , woman , punch , misogyny - Current Score: 26 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| I believe it's important to have proper protection on your computer... Which is why I always put a plastic bag on my keyboard when I'm looking at porn. | |
Joke by ReigatePen, in Sex and shit > Pornography - Tagged pornography , porn , computer - Current Score: 24 - Added: 1 month ago
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