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| Three blokes go to a strip club, two English blokes and a Scottish chap. After being seated at a table near the front, this sexy blonde girl comes over and starts dancing on their table. After a couple of minutes, the stripper has taken off everything apart from her bra and panties. When she takes off her bra, the first English bloke licks a twenty pound note and slaps it to her right arse cheek, next the second English man licks a twenty pound note and slaps it to her left arse cheek. Then she takes off her panties and the Scottish bloke gets his credit card, swipes her arse and takes the fuckin' forty quid! |  |
Joke by pornstar, in Religion and racism > Scottish - Tagged strip ,
english ,
scottish ,
panties ,
twenty ,
pound ,
note ,
credit ,
card ,
swipe ,
table ,
bra ,
blonde - Current Score: 42 - Added: 3 months, 23 days ago This financial crisis is worse than divorce.
My net worth is half what it was last week and I still have the fucking wife. |  |
Credit Crunch,
The new breakfast cereal from Gordon Brown. |  |
What with all this credit crunch gubbins and property prices spiralling downwards, a big recession is forecast. We are on the crest of a slump! Women think they already know everything about financial matter, like combining a career AND a mortgage! Ive been doing that for years without a second thought. I intend to start my own training course, exclusively for the fairer sex. They will be on the following subjects:
1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Actually Making Deposits
3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits
4. Man Management: Minor Household Chores Can Wait Till After The Game
5. Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too.
6. Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His
7. Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First.
8. Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking
9. Communication Skills III: Getting What You Want Without Nagging.
10. Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire.
11. Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
12. Introduction to Parking
13. Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space
14. Water Retention: Fact or Fat?
15. Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter
16. Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption
17. Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People
18. Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully
19. Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have
20. Dancing: Why Men Don't Like To |  |
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