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| I used to hate weddings. All the old dears would poke me and say, "you're next." They soon stopped when I started saying the same to them at funerals. |    |
Joke by Mrwolf, in Illness and mortality > Old people - Tagged aunt , wedding , funeral , death - Current Score: 483 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| The Welsh mining industry looks set for a come-back...... Apparently they've found some copper in Snowdonia. | |
Joke by thecorinthian, in Celebrity and news events > Police - Tagged death , news , uk , police - Current Score: 345 - Added: 5 months ago
| Little Johnny goes into school after being absent the previous day, His teacher demands, "where were you yesterday?" "I'm sorry Miss, my dad got burnt," replies Johnny. "Oh,I'm sorry,I hope it wasn't serious," says the teacher. To which Johnny replies, "well, they don't fuck about at the crematorium." | |
Joke by stu71, in Illness and mortality > Dying - Tagged death , teacher , little johnny , dad - Current Score: 257 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| Two chavs race their Novas off a cliff to see who hits the bottom first...who wins? Society. | |
Joke by Ciabi, in Religion and racism > Chavs - Tagged chavs , cars , racing , death - Current Score: 255 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| Did you hear about the 9 year old African boy? He was going through a mid-life crisis. | |
Joke by twayne, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged africa , death , mid life crisis , black , blacks , nigger , niggers , the onion - Current Score: 239 - Added: 2 months ago
| Bono is at a U2 concert when he asks the audience for some quiet. Then in the silence, he starts to slowly clap his hands. Holding the audience in total silence, he says into the microphone... "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies." A voice from near the front pierces the silence... "Well, fucking speed it up then!" | |
Joke by ht, in Celebrity and news events > Bono - Tagged bono , u2 , african , child , death - Current Score: 236 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| Why did Hitler commit suicide? He got the gas bill. | |
Joke by We Are The Lemon, in Religion and racism > Hitler - Tagged hitler , suicide , gas , bill , death , jews , hollocaust - Current Score: 189 - Added: 1 year, 7 months ago
| My wife said she can do anything twice as well as me. So I donated a kidney. | |
Joke by tom the storyteller, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged wife , kidney , death , competition , donate , organ donation , moob - Current Score: 169 - Added: 1 month ago
| Research shows the first five minutes of life can be the most risky. Somehow I think that the last five minutes aren't so hot either. | |
Joke by BruceWillis, in Illness and mortality > life - Tagged life , death , research - Current Score: 168 - Added: 1 month ago
| I feel that i was unjustly sacked from my job yesterday. My boss felt that having sex with the clients wasn't "appropriate" so he fired me. That's the last time I work for an undertaker. | |
Joke by offended?, in Sex and shit > Necrophilia - Tagged death , necrophillia , sex - Current Score: 166 - Added: 3 months ago
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