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| A man is lying in bed with his wife when she rolls over and says, "Say something dirty to me." He replies, "the dishes." |    |
Joke by The Wolf, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged man , wife , dirty , sex , sexist - Current Score: 252 - Added: 6 months, 26 days ago
| LIDL'S own brand shampoo.... Because you're worthless... | |
Joke by fistheadx36, in Jokes with no home > 50 Cent - Tagged frankie boyle , hygiene , shampoo , dirty , mock the week - Current Score: 229 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| I've been saving a fortune lately. Instead of spending a fortune ringing expensive sex lines, I ring the Samaritans and say, "talk dirty or I'll kill myself!" | |
Joke by FELTCHGIBBON, in Sex and shit > Phone Sex - Tagged sex , phone , dirty , samaritans - Current Score: 220 - Added: 1 month, 28 days ago
| I don't agree with Vodafone's advertising campaign. It states "Be part of the worlds largest mobile community" Now correct me if I'm wrong but that's the Gypsies! | |
Joke by welshmadman, in Religion and racism > Gypsy - Tagged jimmy carr , vodafone , gypsy , dirty , mobile community , phone , pikey , cunt , scum , sick - Current Score: 204 - Added: 1 year ago
| A tramp walks into a jewellers, puts his hands down his trousers and starts fingering his arsehole. The sales assistant shouts at him 'Stop what you're doing and get out!' The tramp says 'You want to make your fucking minds up, you've a sign on the window says come inside and pick your ring in comfort.' | |
Joke by McLOVIN, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged anal , fingering , arse , ring , dirty , tramp , shop , assistant , comfort - Current Score: 123 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| A guy is sitting in a bar one evening on his own. He keeps catching the eye of a lady at the far end of the bar. This goes on for quite some time, before he musters up the courage to go over to her. "Hi, what brings a beautiful woman like you here?" he asks "I've broken up with my boyfriend, so I'm just sitting here drowning my sorrows. He said I was too dirty in the bedroom." "Wow, I'm here for the same reason - my girlfriend's just thrown me out, said I was too filthy as well!" They sit drinking together for the rest of the evening. As she goes to leave, she asks if he'd like to come back to hers and he accepts. When they get back to her place she motions to the sofa and says, "I'll be right out, just going to get ready." She goes into the bathroom and gets out her strap-on dildo, anal beads, whip, gimp outfit, Viagra, and a leather dominatrix outfit. When she comes out, the man is heading towards the door. "Where are you going?" she asks. "Well," says the man, "I've fucked your dog and had a shit in your handbag - I'm off." | |
Joke by tubaros, in Sex and shit > Sick - Tagged filthy , sex , dog , shit , dirty - Current Score: 77 - Added: 9 months ago
| Whilst having sex with the wife last night, she told me to kiss her 'somewhere dirty' So I took her to Slough. | |
Joke by captain slow, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged wife , dirty , slough - Current Score: 71 - Added: 11 months ago
| Red riding hood was walking through the forest when all of a sudden the big bad wolf jumped out and said "Take your blouse off so I can suck your tits!". Red riding hood pulls down her knickers lies on the ground and says "Fuck off, eat me like the book fuckin says!!" | |
Joke by welshmadman, in Sex and shit > Little Red Riding Hood - Tagged pussy , licking , fanny , cunt , red , riding , hood , wolf , funny , dirty , knickers , panties - Current Score: 58 - Added: 1 year ago
| Did you ever hear about the boy who cried Wolf? He was masturbating over 'Gladiators' | |
Joke by ag, in Sex and shit > Wanking - Tagged kirsty gallagher , gladiators , sky , sky one , dirty , penis - Current Score: 45 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| A man goes to psychiatrist because his girlfriend thinks he is obsessed with sex. The doctor draws a square and asks the man what he sees. "Sex," said the man. The doctor drew a circle and asked what the man saw. "Sex," replied the man. So the doctor draws a picture of a triangle and asks the same question. "Sex," said the man. "Well" said the doctor, "you are obsessed with sex." "I'm obsessed?" said the man. "You're the one who keeps drawing the dirty pictures." | |
Joke by cat666, in Sex and shit > Doctor - Tagged doctor , sex , dirty , picture , obsessed - Current Score: 42 - Added: 11 months ago
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