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I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pickpocketed.

How could anyone stoop so low?
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Joke by MICK THE MAG, in Jokes with no home > Dwarfs - Tagged dwarf , pickpocket , little shit  - Current Score: 1139 - Added: 3 weeks ago

This morning on the way to work I drove into the back of a car, at some lights, whilst not really paying attention.

The driver got out... he was a dwarf.

He said, "I'm not happy..."

I replied, "well, which one are you then?"
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Joke by sickfuck, in Jokes with no home > Dwarfs - Tagged dwarf  - Current Score: 375 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago

Why should you never shag a midget with learning difficulties?

It's not big and it's not clever.
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Joke by Fox, in Illness and mortality > Midget - Tagged dwarf , midget , dyslexic , stupid , idiot  - Current Score: 237 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago

There has been an increase in dwarf suicides over the past year.

But its not a big problem.
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Joke by max the storyteller, in Jokes with no home > Dwarfs - Tagged dwarf , size matters  - Current Score: 176 - Added: 1 week ago

The 7 dwarfs are all excited as the new pope is visiting fairy story land.
All week they nudge Dopey sniggering "Well you can finally ask your question!", to which Dopey replies every time "Shurrup willya!"
Finally the day arrives and all the dwarfs are lined up with the other characters from the Snow White story, he shakes hands with the evil Queen, then Snow White then slowly makes his way down the line of the dwarfs.
As he approaches Dopey theres a small chant which gets louder and louder "Ask him.ask him...ask him ASK HIM>!"
"Ask me what?" Questions the pope.
The dwarfs shove Dopey forward "ASK HIM!",
"What would you like to know?", says his holiness.
"Well", begins Dopey, "Are any of your nuns black?"
"Hm" ponders the pope "As a religion we catholics don't differentiate between creed so its more than probable that quite a few of our nuns are black . Does that answer your question?"
ASK HIM!! shout the dwarfs.
"Is there more to your question young man?"
"Erm......do any of your nuns work in Antarctica?"
"well young man we have nuns all around the globe so its more than likely that we have a couple in Antarctica. Does that answer your question?"
ASK HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yell the dwarfs!
"Is there more to this question?" asks the pope now getting more than annoyed.
"Erm..................................are any of these black nuns in Antarctica dwarfs?!
"WHAT"! Splutters the pope.
"I'm sure if we had a black dwarf nun in Antarctica i would have heard of it. So in answer to your question NO!"
All the dwarfs collapse on the floor pissing themselves laughing.
"DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN!! DOPEY SHAGGED A PENGUIN!!"
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Joke by cornish_breeze, in Jokes with no home > Dwarfs - Tagged pope , dwarfs , snow white , fairy story , dwarf , sick , penguin , nun , nuns  - Current Score: 114 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago

HOW DID THE 7 DWARVES GET THEIR NAMES?


Miss Snow White was a randy cow,
And desperate for a fuck,
So off she went into the woods,
To try and get some luck.

She'd almost given up looking,
When she saw some chimney smoke,
Then she stumbled on the cottage,
And went in for a poke.

Her clothes came off in seconds.
And she'd just removed her pants,
When seven dwarves came marching in,
With a merry song and dance.

Snow White just stood there speechless,
And thought she was in heaven,
Originally after one good shag,
But now she could have seven.

Straight away she took command,
My fanny needs a lick!
And when one dwarf moved forward,
She said -You'd better drop your pick.

So down he went onto all fours,
And said -I ain't licking that-,
Not there, that is my arse-hole,
You DOPEY little brat!-

The next dwarf started blushing,
Do we have to do it here?-
Snow White said -Don't be BASHFUL,
Unless you're a fucking queer-

So reluctantly he whipped it out,
To prove he was no fool.
And Snow White gave a big -Heigh-Ho-.
As she rode upon his tool.

Now one dwarf wasn't smiling.
Cos he hadn't had a sniff,
And due to his impatience,
He couldn't raise a stiff.

Relax- you GRUMPY bastard-,
So he did as he was told,
And as soon as he was hard enough,
He shot his fuckin load.

The next dwarf got a blow-job,
And she took him deep quite easy,
But she just avoided brain-damage,
When he sneezed, she called him SNEEZY.

With three dwarves left, she turned and said,
You're next, I want your knob!-
But no sooner had he entered her,
he was sleeping on the job.

Wake up you SLEEPY bastard-
She wanted more from him.
he woke with such excitement,
That he filled her hairy quim.

The next dwarf rammed his up her,
And shagged her fanny raw,
A dazed Snow White then whimpered.
That should be against the law.-

He made poor Snow White tremble,
He was so big and thick.
No wonder you're so HAPPY,
With that fucking great big dick-

With one dwarf still remaining,
But feeling rather sore,
She said -You'll have to use your tongue,
My twat can't take no more!-

So he put his tongue to work,
Where others had placed their cocks,
And 'cos he made Snow White feel better,
She named the last one DOC.

So there's the truth about the dwarves,
And how they got their names,
By satisfying Miss Snow White,
And joining in her games.

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Joke by snorbens, in Sex and shit > General - Tagged snow white , poem , dwarf  - Current Score: 60 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago

What did the dwarf get when he ran through a woman's legs?

A clit round the ear and a flap across the face!
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Joke by sick puppy, in Sex and shit > General - Tagged dwarf , fanny , clit , flaps  - Current Score: 46 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago

A guy calls his buddy, the horse rancher, and says he's sending a friend over to look at a horse.
His buddy asks, 'How will I recognize him?'
'That's easy; he's a midget with a speech impediment.'

So, the midget shows up, and the guy asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse.
'A female horth.' So he shows him a prized filly.
'Nith lookin horth. Can I thee her eyeth'?
So the guy picks up the midget and he gives the horse's eyes the once over.
'Nith eyeth, can I thee her earzth'?
So he picks the little fella up again, and shows him the horse's ears.
'Nith earzth, can I see her mouf'?
The rancher is getting pretty ticked off by this point, but he picks him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.
'Nice mouf, can I see her twot'?
Totally mad as fire at this point,the rancher grabs him under his arms and rams the midget's head as far as he can up the horse's fanny, pulls him out and slams him on the ground.
The midget gets up, sputtering and coughing.'Perhapth I should rephwase that. Can I thee her wun awound a widdlebit'?
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Joke by Rexton, in Jokes with no home > Dwarfs - Tagged dwarf , midget , speech impediment  - Current Score: 43 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago

I was down the pub last night when a dwarf walked in.

I shouted, "hey, short ass, where's the other six?"

He said, "fuck off, I hate cunts like you."

He must have been Grumpy.
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Joke by ReigatePen, in Illness and mortality > Dwarf - Tagged dwarf , seven dwarfs , pub , grumpy  - Current Score: 37 - Added: 1 month, 7 days ago

What is the difference between a midget and a freak?

Political correctness
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Joke by 619no1, in Illness and mortality > Midget - Tagged midget , freak , dwarf  - Current Score: 30 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago

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