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| A wife was trying to explain the purchase of some expensive underwear to her husband. "After all, dear," she said, "you wouldn't expect to find fine perfume in a cheap bottle, would you?" "No," the husband replied, "and I wouldn't expect to find gift wrapping on a dead beaver either!" |    |
Joke by pottyonetoo, in Sex and shit > Underwear - Tagged beaver , dead , expensive - Current Score: 79 - Added: 2 months ago
| Don't bother wasting money on subscribing to expensive adult web sites or calling 0898 phone numbers. Just phone your local department store and ask them to describe their latest selection of ladies' lingerie, while masturbating furiously. | |
Joke by munkybars, in Sex and shit > Wanking - Tagged furiously , lingerie , department , phone , expensive - Current Score: 74 - Added: 3 months ago
| This woman is walking past a brothel, when she notices a sign which reads Celebrity Sex Wayne Rooney £500 per night Andrew flintoff £700 per night Father Christmas £2000 per night so she goes in to enquire about the price list, the manager tells her that the reason wayne rooney is so cheap is because he 'dribbles before he shoots', and the reason that andrew flintoff is cheap is because 'once he's in , you can't get him out' , then she asks " why is father christmas so expensive?", and the manager says " well , he only comes once a year , but he'll fill yer fucking stockings" | |
Joke by pornstar, in Sex and shit > Brothel - Tagged brothel , rooney , flintoff , father christmas , stockings , cheap , expensive , price , dribbles , shoots - Current Score: 38 - Added: 1 year ago
| One Saturday, a man and a woman walk into a very posh shop. "Show the lady your finest mink!" the man demands. So the owner of the shop goes in the back and comes out with a full-length coat. As the lady tries it on, the owner sidles up to the man and whispers, "Ah, sir, that particular fur goes for fifty thousand pounds." "No problem!" says the man. "I'll write a cheque!" "Very good, sir," says the owner. "You may come by on Monday to pick the coat up, after the cheque clears." So the man and the woman leave. On Monday, the man returns on his own. The owner's outraged. "How dare you show your face in here? There wasn't a penny in your account." "Sorry," grins the man, "but I wanted to thank you for the most wonderful weekend of my life!" | |
Joke by King Mustard, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged sex , wife , mink , posh , expensive - Current Score: 33 - Added: 5 months, 30 days ago
| Well, the Paralympics are over. I'm so sad I didn't get to go. Mind you, the tickets cost you an arm and a leg | |
Joke by bluedishwasher, in Jokes with no home > Paralympics - Tagged paralympics , expensive , chinese bastards taking over - Current Score: 22 - Added: 2 months ago
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