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| Have you ever noticed that it's only 'perfect' people who are murdered or killed in horrific accidents? "He was the perfect son" or "She was the perfect daughter." "Such a tragic accident they were the perfect family." "They died together,the perfect couple till the end." Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife. Kind of makes me immortal. |    |
Joke by justincider, in Illness and mortality > Death - Tagged perfect , family , death - Current Score: 3624 - Added: 3 weeks ago
| A man says to his wife, "Tell me something that will make me happy and sad at the same time." His wife replies, "You've got a bigger dick than your brother." | |
Joke by kitkat456, in Jokes with no home > families - Tagged dick , family , wife , husband - Current Score: 496 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| Carlsberg don't do family slaughter... But Fosters do. | |
Joke by jokeywokey, in Celebrity and news events > Deaths - Tagged fosters , carlsberg , family - Current Score: 392 - Added: 2 months ago
| I took my girlfriend round to see my family today. My wife went fucking mental. | |
Joke by max the storyteller, in Sex and shit > Girlfriend - Tagged girlfriend , wife , family , cheat - Current Score: 346 - Added: 3 days ago
| What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family. | |
Joke by check_the_exit, in Religion and racism > Pakistani - Tagged black , bench , funny , racist , racism , family - Current Score: 322 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| I was at a family gathering and I had a shocking realisation. I saw my mother-in-law, and it hit me - in 25 years time, that's what my wife will look like. But it wasn't all bad - it occured to me that, in 25 years, our young daughter will probably look like my wife does now - so there is always that option. | |
Joke by petejtool, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged wife , mother in law , ugly , sex , incest , baby , women , daughter , family - Current Score: 226 - Added: 4 months, 23 days ago
| An asylum seeker is at the side of the road eating grass. A man pulls up in his car and says, "Hey! Don't eat that. Come home with me and I'll feed you." The asylum seeker replies, "I have four wives and twelve kids, can they come too?" The man says, "Fuck off, I've only got a small lawn!" | |
Joke by ht, in Religion and racism > assylum seekers - Tagged assylum , family - Current Score: 208 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| 22,000 dead in Burma so far. Both families are said to be devastated. | |
Joke by arrowmaker, in Celebrity and news events > Burma - Tagged burma , cyclone , family , jahi - Current Score: 157 - Added: 6 months ago
| I'm sweating like an Austrian at a family reunion. | |
Joke by goingtohell, in Celebrity and news events > Austrian - Tagged fritzl , family , incest , austria , austrian , sex - Current Score: 150 - Added: 6 months ago
| Dear Susan, I am writing to tell you that our relationship must end, I am not the man you think I am. For a long time I have been sexually attracted to your sister.On several occasions I have had sex with her and I know you will find this unbearable. What is probably worse than sleeping with your sister is the fact that I have also been having a sexual relationship with your mother. Add this to the fact that, after a drunken night out, I had anal sex with your brother, you will now see what a terrible person I am. One final confession susan. Shortly after I started a sexual relationship with you, your father started pestering me for sex and yes I gave in to him. And so Susan you must now see why I must end our relationship. I know this is all a shock but it is better out in the open. I am so very sorry if I've hurt you,I never meant to. Your loving brother, David xxx | |
Joke by justincider, in Sex and shit > Incest - Tagged letter , relationship , man , sister , sex , mother , confession , drunk , father , brother , family - Current Score: 137 - Added: 4 weeks ago
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