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| I'd just like to thank all those people who have taken the time to put lovely bouquets of flowers by the side of the road. It really brightens up my drive to work. |    |
Joke by billybobbob, in Illness and mortality > Death - Tagged death , driving , flowers - Current Score: 580 - Added: 1 month ago
| Why waste money on flowers trying to increase your odds of getting a shag, when you can just buy a gun and guarantee it? | |
Joke by albinobob123, in Sex and shit > Rape - Tagged rape , shag , sex , flowers , gun - Current Score: 220 - Added: 4 months ago
| A man walked into a florist’s and said, ''I’d like some flowers, please.'' ''Certainly, sir. What did you have in mind?'' ''I’m not sure.'' ''Perhaps I could help,'' suggested the florist. ''What exactly have you done?'' | |
Joke by gartnavel, in Sex and shit > Relationships - Tagged flowers , man , apology , sorry , wife , husband - Current Score: 166 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| I was driving down a country lane and saw a small flower display. They won't sell much there, it's on a really dodgy corner. | |
Joke by bawbag, in Illness and mortality > Car Crash - Tagged flowers , dead - Current Score: 19 - Added: 2 months, 24 days ago
| Two blokes are sitting in a pub. One says "I gave my wife some flowers last night". "Really, did she like them" asked the second man? "No" says the first bloke "she found the label". "What, did she find out how much they cost ?" asked the second man. "No. She found out she was not a family who died in a car crash". | |
Joke by RevvyB, in Illness and mortality > Car Crash - Tagged car crash , flowers - Current Score: 17 - Added: 6 months ago
| My front garden's won £500 in a "Britain in Bloom" competition! It's fucking great living next to an accident hotspot! | |
Joke by ReigatePen, in Illness and mortality > Death - Tagged death , accidents , accident hotspot , flowers - Current Score: 13 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| People say you should always remove the label from presents, not least if you give your girlfriend flowers you stole from a grave stone. | |
Joke by The Wolf, in Sex and shit > Girlfriend - Tagged girlfriend , flowers - Current Score: 8 - Added: 3 months ago
| The little old lady down the end of my road got hit by a car this morning and killed. It's such a shame - two days earlier and I could've got the wife some flowers for Easter. | |
Joke by Guest, in Illness and mortality > Accident - Tagged accident , easter , flowers - Current Score: -1 - Added: 7 months, 30 days ago
| The wife came upto me after I got home from work and said "Thanks for the flowers, it was a lovely surprise." Damn fucking right it was a surprise, I haven't been to a graveyard for years. | |
Joke by Beavis, in Jokes with no home > Wife - Tagged wife , flowers , graveyard , surprise - Current Score: -4 - Added: 1 week ago
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