Sorted by: Highest Scoring | Lowest Scoring | Newest | Oldest
Page 1 of 2 - Next Page
| What's the closest thing to a woman's period? Your Salary - It comes once a month, lasts between 5 and 7 days and if it doesn't come you're fucked! |    |
Joke by Mrmanc08, in Sex and shit > Period - Tagged period , salary , sex , fucked - Current Score: 200 - Added: 5 months ago
| My wife recently complained about my lack of interest in her family. So I fucked her mother. | |
Joke by figster, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged mother , fucked , wife - Current Score: 141 - Added: 1 month, 26 days ago
| A depressed young woman was so desperate that she decided to end her life by throwing herself into the ocean. When she went down to the docks, a handsome young sailor noticed her tears, took pity on her, and said, "Look, you've got a lot to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I'll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slipped his arm around her shoulder and added, "I'll keep you happy, and you'll keep me happy." The girl nodded yes, after all, what did she have to lose? That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine search, she was discovered by the captain. 'What are you doing here?' the captain asked. She got up off the ground and explained, "I have an arrangement with one of the sailors. He's taking me to Europe, and he's screwing me." The captain looked at her, "He sure is lady, this is the Staten Island Ferry.' | |
Joke by unfunny, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged woman , sailor , ferry , fucked - Current Score: 117 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| Condoms aren't completely safe. A friend of mine was wearing one and got hit by a bus. | |
Joke by lovelace, in Sex and shit > Condom - Tagged fucked , o - Current Score: 114 - Added: 2 months, 27 days ago
| Can everyone please stop joking about Newcastle and get off King Kev's back. Give him a couple of years and he will definitely bring silverware back to St.James's... ...it's called the Johnstone Paint Trophy. | |
Joke by DDJ, in Celebrity and news events > Kevin Keegan - Tagged newcastle , king kev , fucked - Current Score: 26 - Added: 5 months, 29 days ago
| A meteor struck Earth and the sole surviving man wakes up to see himself surrounded by hundreds mutated cannibals ready to eat him alive at any second. The man was in shock, and whispered to himself, "Oh my God... I'm fucked." The clouds parted and a ray of light made its way down to where the man was. Gods voice spoke to him saying "No.. you are not fucked, don't worry. Throw that piece of rock in front of you as hard as you can to the cannibal with the biggest head mask." The man hits the Chief of the tribe right on the forehead with the rock. And with that, he collapsed to the floor. God: "Now you're fucked." | |
Joke by nahgut, in Jokes with no home > Advice - Tagged cannibal , rock , screwed , earth , meteor , god , fucked - Current Score: 25 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| Ann Summers have just announced a new range of Mohammed shaped vibrators. A spokesperson for the company said "Now every woman can be fucked by Islam!" | |
Joke by Guest, in Religion and racism > Muslim - Tagged islam , mohammed , muslim , vibrator , fucked - Current Score: 24 - Added: 9 months ago
| What's the difference between Gordon Brown and a Strap-on?. You might actually have a smile on your face whilst being fucked by the Strap-on | |
Joke by whogivesashit, in Jokes with no home > Arseholes - Tagged gordon brown , primeminister , strap on , sex , anal , sex , gay , fucked - Current Score: 16 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| Kate Moss and Jeremy Clarkson are at a celebrity do. She says "I'm a model, what do you do?" He replies "I do Top Gear." She said "Wicked! I'll have an eighth." | |
Joke by tony.t, in Celebrity and news events > Kate Moss - Tagged death , fucked , smackheads , cunts , a listers , z listers , junkies , tv , all , drugs - Current Score: 15 - Added: 11 months ago
| Just before I made love to my girlfriend she said, "give me twelve inches, big boy, and make me bleed!" So I punched her in the mouth and fucked her twice! | |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Girlfriend - Tagged inches , girlfriend , fucked - Current Score: 14 - Added: 6 months ago
Page 1 of 2 - Next Page
Server: Custurd in 0.6s using 12 queries. She's 10.87% angry.
Sickipedia v2.1 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel