Sorted by: Highest Scoring | Lowest Scoring | Newest | Oldest
Page 1 of 2 - Next Page
| Ive just been down my garden and was shocked to see my dog fucking a cabbage...silly little bastard must of thought it was a collie!! |    |
Joke by pornstar, in Religion and racism > ? - Tagged dog , garden , cabbage , collie - Current Score: 113 - Added: 5 months ago
| My wife's spent hours in the back garden today. Suppose I'd better go unlock the back door. | |
Joke by ReigatePen, in Jokes with no home > Wife - Tagged wife , garden - Current Score: 79 - Added: 4 months ago
| A couple was going out for the evening. They'd gotten ready, all dolled-up , dog put out, etc. The taxi arrives and as they start out, the dog shoots back in the house. They don't want the dog shut in, so the wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes upstairs to chase the dog out. The wife, not wanting it known that the house will be empty explains to the taxi driver, "He's just going upstairs to say good-bye to my mother." A few minutes later, the husband gets into the cab. "Sorry I took so long" he says. "Stupid bitch was hiding under the bed and I had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching and biting me as I hauled her arse downstairs and tossed her out in the back yard! She better not shit in the vegetable garden again!" | |
Joke by McLOVIN, in Illness and mortality > Dead - Tagged taxi , husband , wife , garden , dog , driver , house , mother , cab , couple , coat - Current Score: 68 - Added: 8 months ago
| My wife wanted to try a new sex position last night, which she called "The Wheelbarrow". "Basically I place my hands on the floor while you grab my legs from behind and stick it in. You get the idea don't you?" she asked. I sure did. I carried the bitch to the garden and told her to pull out some weeds. | |
Joke by mamma mia, in Sex and shit > Karma Sutra - Tagged sex position , wheelbarrow , garden , gardening , weeds - Current Score: 46 - Added: 2 months, 28 days ago
| How do you know when a Frenchman has been in your garden? All your bins are empty and your cat's pregnant. | |
Joke by smokey, in Religion and racism > French - Tagged french , garden , bins , cat , pregnant - Current Score: 25 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| My girlfriend gets really emotional after sex, always crying... Soon sorted with a quick game of peep-po, or round and round the garden. | |
Joke by whogivesashit, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged sex , kiddy fiddler , garden , sick sick people - Current Score: 22 - Added: 2 months, 26 days ago
| Our local water authority's said that there could be a hosepipe ban if we have a warm summer. I'm not worried... I've had a 24 foot long tap installed! | |
Joke by ReigatePen, in Jokes with no home > Garden - Tagged garden , hosepipe ban - Current Score: 18 - Added: 6 months ago
| I put a scarecrow up in my garden, to stop the birds nicking fruit from the trees. Just for fun, I put a Jade Goody mask on it. Fuck me, it must have scared the shit out of the birds, they started bringing the cherries back that they'd stolen last year! | |
Joke by geebee, in Celebrity and news events > Jade Goody - Tagged scarecrow , cherries , garden , frightening - Current Score: 14 - Added: 3 weeks ago
| My gran asked me to go round there earlier and help her in the garden. So I went round there and pushed her out the back door. | |
Joke by ReigatePen, in Jokes with no home > Grandma - Tagged gran , garden - Current Score: 13 - Added: 1 month ago
| What's got two heads, four arms, and four legs? Peter Tobin's garden | |
Joke by Guest, in Celebrity and news events > Peter Tobin - Tagged peter , tobin , garden - Current Score: 12 - Added: 1 year ago
Page 1 of 2 - Next Page
Custurd spent 0.05ms doing 12 queries and 0.09s processing. She's 5.36% angry.
Sickipedia v2.7 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel